Take My Pain Away
by CandyElly
Summary: Kakashi and Sakura have grown close after the disappearance of Sasuke. But what happens when their friendship is threatened...? Loved ones watch as their new stories unfold. KakaSaku, Angst. Rated R for strong language, nudity, and sexual content.
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: These guys aren't mine ;;

This is my first Naruto fanfiction and my first fanfic in a while. I really would like reviews to keep me going I already have the whole plot written out and it will be a long one. I went ahead and rated the first chapter R because the rest of the fic will need that rating. Initially I wanted to upload the first 3 chapters all at once but chapter 1 ended up so long that I just decided to just upload this one as soon as it was done.

KakaSaku and SasuSaku will take place during the course of this fanfic!

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Haruna Sakura was Konoha's rising new star pertaining to Jounins. She may have always been a step or two behind her teammates but that was still a step above everyone else. Her skills were great enough to warrant promotion to Jounin at only the age of 19. Uzumaki Naruto and Uchiha Sasuke, her teammates for many years, had both passed the exam over a year prior.

Sakura looked up at the sky from her perch in a cherry blossom tree and smiled. It was a beautiful day and she was only taking a short break while sparring with Naruto. Life was grand and she could always count on her good friend to train with her daily.

"Hey, Sakura! You aren't giving up are you?" Naruto grinned in her direction and Sakura turned her head to look at him. He still had that same boyish optimistic attitude, and his dream of Hokage had never wavered. However, in terms of appearance, he was a completely new person. He was now a head taller than Sakura and his muscles had formed him rather nicely. His facial features were more defined and that boyish grin had evolved into a handsome smile. Sakura could see his collarbone jut through his shirt and she smiled. Personally she had always found that part of a man quite sexy. Not that she was attracted to Naruto.

"No, but I do believe it sounds like you are trying to give up on me!" She returned Naruto's grin as she stood up from her branch and lunged at him with a kunai in hand.

Sakura's speed had significantly increased over the years; Kakashi had decided that this was most likely the smartest area for her to concentrate. Genjutsu was also a strong point of hers though she was nowhere near as talented as Sasuke. Her stamina, however, was still lacking. Her speed was greater than Naruto but in the end she tired too quickly and he had the best of her.

Naruto blocked the girl's charge and pushed her backwards with force. Sakura quickly found her footing while flying backwards and propelled herself upwards to another branch. Naruto easily moved below her branch and reached up to snatch her feet when she disappeared in a puff of cherry blossoms. "Hmph! Woman, I told you to quit doing that."

He could hear Sakura's laughter around him as his head turned from side to side trying to locate the direction her voice was coming from. Suddenly she appeared behind him and Naruto felt her hand grab his neck as he tried to turn to defend himself from his opponent.

"Looks like you're still too slow, Naruto-chan." Sakura grinned evilly as she brought her kunai up to his throat.

"Well unfortunately some of us had men obsessed with frogs train us. Frogs aren't that fast." Naruto scowled at his defeat. The only time that he was able to move at high speed was when he called upon the chakra of the demon inside of him, and he only saved that for life or death situations.

"Give up now?"

"Never!" Naruto exclaimed proudly.

"Oh well then I guess we'll skip lunch. I wasn't in the mood for ramen anyways..." Sakura dropped her hands from Naruto's neck and gave off a fake dramatic sigh.

"Sakura, don't even tease me." Naruto sent a scolding look in Sakura's direction.

"I'm not, come on. My treat!" She didn't even have to ask twice, Naruto was already on his way to the restaurant.

The two teammates walked down into the restaurant and sat down at the bar. Sure they were both now jounins but they still preferred to accept missions in the same old team of Naruto, Sakura, Sasuke, and Kakashi. Sadly, group missions were now coming few and far between and they could feel themselves beginning to lose touch with Sasuke.

The cook already knew what they wanted, and had begun on the order the second he saw Naruto walk through the door. There were conveniences to being a regular sometimes.

"Naruto, have you spoken to Sasuke lately?" Sakura played with her chopsticks and contemplated what the boy could be up to.

"He's the same as ever. He doesn't feel like gracing us with his splendid presence I suppose." Naruto said this with obvious sarcasm. He still had some disdain for his rival. "The guy has no manners!"

Sasuke had ceased training with them when Sakura reached Jounin status a few months ago. She couldn't possibly believe it was her promotion that caused this, but she couldn't figure out what it could be either so she just let it go. He took a lot of solo missions now and they kept him away from town. Sakura was cold to him, she had given up pursuing the cold handsome boy years ago.

"I just worry about him." She didn't really. _Stay gone._

"Don't start that again..." Naruto groaned.

"No, not in that way you idiot." Sakura sighed, she knew she would forever be teased for her childhood obsession with the great Uchiha heir.

They both sat patiently awaiting their food. Sakura wasn't extremely hungry but she knew it was about time for nourishment...they had trained rough today.

"Speaking of missing teammates, where is Kakashi?" Naruto looked around the restaurant. He hadn't expected to see him here and he couldn't really reason with why he was looking around. Kakashi rarely came here unless it was for a drink at night.

"I think he told me that he had a mission and would be back in a few days," Sakura stopped and counted the days on her fingers, "which should be today!" She grinned at the realization they could see their teacher again. She was itching to learn some new Genjutsu, and she still hadn't seen that damn face.

"Still after the mask, Sakura?" Naruto's laughter was quickly ceased with the act of ramen being fed into his mouth as the cook had just placed their dishes on their table.

"I'll get it one day, you just watch!" Sakura was pretty confident on this manner. Sure it had been around seven years since she had first attempted to see his face, but that didn't mean anything.

Naruto didn't even bother in response as he choked down his food.

"At least stop to enjoy it!"

No response. Sakura sighed and slowly slurped her noodles. She saw Naruto finish up out of the corner of her eye.

"I'm going to run to the store, I totally need to restock my cabinets." Naruto smiled with his not so quite full stomach.

"You just ate!" Sakura exclaimed.

"So?" Naruto laughed and bounced out of the restaurant leaving Sakura to finish her meal alone.

Once Sakura finished the last of her noodles she paid the cook and began walking towards her home. She still lived with her parents, as her family was close, but she was given an apartment style room with a separate entrance. It was entirely for the purpose of not disturbing them coming and going from missions in odd hours, she didn't exactly have a love life to hide.

She walked down the road looking at her feet hit the rocks and spread them in different directions. A quick thought to herself about disturbing the rocks sleeping time made her laugh. Silly thoughts such as these were often.

Sakura had developed into a beautiful young woman. Her hair was worn long and fell to her mid back, but this time not to impress Sasuke. Her legs seemed to go on for miles, or so Naruto joked, and she was quite tall. Her figure had developed in a way that turned heads. She never tried to accent her features, but she still got the occasional old man with ulterior motives.

The two most eligible girls in town were her and Ino, and Sakura really didn't care. Ino, however, used it to her full advantage. Sakura had ceased playing those games and had even handed Sasuke over. Actually she enjoyed watching Ino's frustration in trying to seduce the dark haired jounin, as it never ever worked. Not even once.

"Sakura!"

Sakura turned her head to see who had called her name so close to her own apartment. She looked around the crowd and focused on Kakashi, who was waving with his hand above his head.

"You're back! In one piece, I see. I assume things went well." She turned around and quickened her step to a light jog to get to him.

"Just an escort mission, piece of cake." Kakashi's one exposed eye turned upwards slightly and Sakura could tell he was smiling. "I just reported in, I'm actually on my way to unwind at my place before tonight."

"Tonight? You have to leave again?" Sakura had not heard of any events to take place tonight so she had assumed it was a mission.

"No, I just really want to hit the bar after that long and boring mission."

"Would you like company?"

Kakashi looked at the girl suspiciously, "Ok you're a year underage...and I won't let you take advantage of me."

Sakura stepped back shocked, "Take...advantage..?"

"You won't see my face that easy, Sakura." His one visible eye closed in what Sakura supposed was a wink.

"Kakashi!" Sakura screamed, "Don't freak me out like that! Me take advantage of you?! What the hell were you thinking?!" She was making quite the scene and to conclude the dramatization she smacked him upside the head.

"Ow." He said, rubbing the back of his head.

"You deserved it." She turned away, pouting. "I was on my way home to relax and visit with mother. I haven't spoken to her in a few days so I should be going."

"Ok, but Sakura, one thing before you go."

"Yes?"

"Where is Sasuke?" Kakashi lost his playful tone.

"You know just as well as I do, sensei." Sakura replied coldly and continued her way on the walk to her home.

Sakura had been at home for several hours and the day was coming to an end. Her mother was sewing, a favourite hobby of hers, and Sakura had helped her out to pass the time. Her mother and she were great friends and Sakura didn't have any idea what she would do without her.

"What are your plans for tonight dear?" Sakura's mother didn't even look up from her sewing machine when she asked.

"I don't really have any, I'll probably sleep early."

"A popular girl like you has no plans?" The woman let out a small laugh as she teased her daughter.

"I'm not popular, mom. Quit that."

"I'm not complaining either! The less popular my daughter is then the more she can help me out with my sewing, now come over here and cut this for me please."

Sakura sighed and walked over to her mother. Sewing wasn't her favourite thing in the world, and besides, she had enough training outfits already. Sakura had just found the scissors when there was a knock at the door.

"Go open it dear."

Sakura obliged and walked lazily to the door to let in whom she assumed would be one of her mother's annoying friends. _Great, someone can help her sew. _

The door was pulled open and to Sakura's great surprise it wasn't one of her mother's friends. Standing there in a casual button down black shirt and pants was Kakashi. He of course was still sporting the trademark headband and mask.

"What are you doing here?" She asked.

Kakashi smirked and said sarcastically, "Well hello and yes I'd love to come in!"

Sakura stammered, "Oh god I'm sorry. You just surprised me, is all. Please come in." She moved away leaving the door open and heading back to the table where she had placed the scissors.

"Kakashi! Hello young man." Sakura's mother actually took the time to look up to see the presumably handsome man, though no one could say for sure. "It's nice to know that you stay so close to your students. I know most of the instructors just discard them after the rank exams are finished."

Kakashi laughed, "Well I suppose they make good company. And I'm no longer a young man." He looked over at Sakura who was still wearing her training garb, "Why aren't you ready?"

"Ready?? For what!"

"That drink."

"But! You said—" Her explanation was cut off my his deep laughter, which she had to admit was sexy in a way.

_Sakura, don't think like that. Teacher. Student. OK? Not sexy, father figure. _

"Fine I'll be down in a moment. Bye mom!" Sakura ran out the front door into the entrance of her apartment on the ledge above to change into something more casual.

The clothing decided upon was a red Chinese cut top with her clan symbol on the back in a white circle. Her pants were simple white pants that hung loosely from her figure. She didn't feel like showing off, it only asked for trouble. After she was all set she opened her apartment door to find Kakashi leaning against the railing right outside, waiting on her.

"I thought you said I couldn't come." She asked the older man leaning on the railing.

He looked up at her, "I only said you couldn't take advantage of me."

"I would never!"

Kakashi laughed and began to walk down the stairs, "Oh you and I both know you'd go to extreme measures to take this mask down and see my adorable face."

"You have me figured out all wrong." Sakura was making an attempt to defend herself even though she knew Kakashi actually had it all right down to the dot.

He remained silent as they walked and finally Sakura added, "Ok maybe you're right. But ok, not tonight."

"Promise?"

"Promise."

Kakashi walked at the side of the young woman who was formerly his official student. Since she was now a jounin he was no longer required to teach her, but he chose to in his free time. She looked stunning in her outfit. He knew he shouldn't stare.

"Hey, old man, where are we going?" Sakura tugged on his sleeve in question.

Kakashi coughed, "Old...man...?"

"You said it yourself just a few minutes ago so no scolding me! So where are we going?" Sakura skipped a little ahead of him.

As they rounded the corner the small restaurant that Sakura had eaten at earlier came into view. Kakashi held the curtain aside for her as she entered.

"Well that answers my question." Sakura surveyed the room and spotted Naruto in a corner table. "Naruto!" She threw her arm up and waved at him as they headed his direction.

Sakura sat next to Naruto and Kakashi took his seat on the opposite side of the table. Kakashi called for a bottle of sake and Sakura settled on a simple appetizer dish for she was still full from the ramen a few hours earlier.

"Such a coincidence meeting you here Naruto. I thought you would be at home eating your Cup Ramen you just bought." She gave him a curious look.

"Kakashi asked me to come!" Naruto piped up, a noodle hanging out of his mouth. Handsome, but he was still a goof.

Sakura looked at Kakashi and he nodded, "Well I wanted to catch up with my students," he smiled, "and I wanted to ask you two about Sasuke."

Suddenly Sakura tensed up and she felt that Kakashi noticed it.

"Sorry Sakura." He offered his apologies for the tender subject that shouldn't be avoided.

"Oh nothing is wrong!" She smiled and brushed it off. She didn't miss him, she preferred him gone.

Kakashi was given his bottle of sake as he asked his next question, "Where the hell is he?"

"We thought he was on a mission, did you check with Tsunade?" Naruto offered.

"Yes, he hasn't been reporting for any missions. The last one he did was completed over a month ago, and we have no clue where he could have ran off to, or why." Kakashi had a concerned look in his eye. The Uchiha boy was very valuable to Konoha and if he fell into the wrong hands there could be dire consequences. Many ninjas would give the lives of their own families to possess the knowledge of the sharigan. Of course Kakashi was not expecting Sasuke to be had so easily, and with his strange behavior as of late he figured he had just run off on his own.

Sakura looked down at the table, not speaking. This didn't sound good and she really didn't want to deal with any more frustration brought on by the boy. It really was a waste of energy, she concluded.

"He's been acting really weird lately." Naruto noted. "I mean I wouldn't put it past him to up and disappear for a month at a time. The only word Sakura and I get out of him anymore is 'hmph'."

It wasn't the complete truth, Sakura knew. He had shared words with her. She hadn't told anyone, it was no ones business but her own. She had to say something, though... "Ino says they got in a fight."

Naruto choked on his ramen, "Ino and Sasuke aren't together! Sasuke doesn't speak much but he _did_ tell me how bloody annoying she is."

"Did she really tell you that, Sakura?" Kakashi asked, looking in her direction.

The pink haired girl tensed up even more at the further inquiry. She now decided she should have just kept quiet. She couldn't lie to Kakashi, not about this. "No..." She said softly.

Everyone was silent for a moment waiting for her to elaborate on her false statement, however, she never did. Instead she rose to her feet, not making eye contact with either man at the table, "I'm not feeling well, I think I'll head home."

Kakashi and Naruto watched her walk out of the restaurant with her gaze to the floor. This was highly unusual for Sakura as she usually held her head up high with confidence. Neither spoke or made any attempt to stop her.

"Kakashi you should go see." Naruto poked him with a chopstick.

"She's more likely to tell you what is going on." Kakashi nodded in a way that implied for him to get up and go after the girl.

"Don't get me wrong...I'm worried about her...but I'm still eating."

"Naruto, you are hopeless." Kakashi said as he stood up from the table to go after Sakura. He waved in apology to the waiter and yelled something about Naruto paying for it. He really did wonder what kind of nerve he had struck in Sakura. Even earlier in the day when he had asked her about him she had gone cold and ran off. Surely it wasn't that she was still obsessed with the Uchiha.

Outside a breeze had picked up and Kakashi picked up his pace towards the direction of Sakura's house. To his surprise she wasn't there, and her mother hadn't seen her. Where else would she go? It was dark and most of the shops were closed. He decided to go check the cherry blossom trees, where she spent all her time training. Vaguely a memory of Naruto saying that was her favourite spot came to mind.

He was not completely surprised when he found her there on the edge of the trees, sitting on one of the top branches of a tree and staring at the stars. He quietly walked up behind her. Sneaking up on her wasn't his intention, and he wasn't attempting it. She knew he was there.

"Kakashi I don't want you to tell anyone." Sakura spoke suddenly without turning her head to look at the older man.

"You have my word." In a quick gust of wind he appeared on the branch next to her. Instead of looking at his student he shared the view of the sky with her.

"The night before Sasuke went missing...he...he..." Kakashi could hear the girl beside him lightly start to cry as she huddled her knees up to her chest.

If this didn't beat all, what the hell was he supposed to do with her now that she was crying? He wasn't any good with these things. "I'm here, Sakura."

"I know but god it's hard Kakashi, I didn't think he would..." She began to cry harder and Kakashi moved over to sit next to her and he wrapped his arm around her, pulling her in to cry on his shoulder.

"What happened?"

"He tried to...tried to...well and I pushed him away," she said between cries, "he wouldn't leave and I cut his face with the kunai I keep near my bed. I didn't want to... I ran away without looking back and stayed at Naruto's. He didn't know what was going on, I didn't tell him. The next morning Sasuke was gone."

Kakashi nodded, "I'm sorry Sakura..." he squeezed her tight in comfort and looked down to see her tear streaked face looking up at him.

"I don't know why...Kakashi, I really don't. I don't love him and I never did!" She proclaimed rather boldly. "He just came over to my place while I was sleeping..."

"You were sleeping?" Kakashi said in shock. Had they been on a date he might could write it off on Sasuke being a lack of a gentleman...but coming into Sakura's room uninvited was a different story.

"I'm glad he left. I wouldn't feel safe if he were still here."

Kakashi looked down at his former student as she cried into his arm. He knew it wasn't a pleasant thing for a woman to go through, even if she got away...and for it to be from her teammate and life long friend must have made it even harder. Her pink hair was beginning to fall loose from her bun and onto his arm. Unconsciously he reached up with his other hand and slipped some of the fallen locks through his fingers.

_She's beautiful..._

"Sakura, I'm your teacher, right? I'm supposed to keep you safe." He hugged her out of friendship, "I promise as long as I am here you will be."


	2. An Impossible Mission

Thank you everyone for your reviews on Chapter 1! It may not seem angsty now, but there is a reason this is rated R... expect uber angsty and adult situations...later on in the story though I didn't want to have to change the rating at a later date and lose readers that didn't want such graphic violent/sexual scenes.

I must give credit to my boyfriend for helping me write the sparring scene in this chapter! He did an awesome job I'll probably recruit him to help me write all my future fights too, lol.

* * *

Sakura woke with the sun shining through the window above her bed. All too quickly the memories of last night's events came rushing back to her. With a groan she rolled back over and pulled the covers over her head of pink.

She had told Kakashi everything...well almost everything. Truth be told she had promised to herself that she would never speak of what happened between her and Sasuke. There were many reasons. First of all she had pride and in some way the fact that Sasuke had taken advantage of her, or attempted to, hurt that pride. Secondly, she didn't want to upset Ino. Ino was her friend once more since she had given up her advances on the Uchiha boy.

_Why would Sasuke do such a thing?_ It was a question that had ran through her mind many times in the past month. Sure, Sasuke was extremely hard to read as he expressed interest in nothing other than becoming stronger...but attempted _rape_ didn't seem like something he could bring himself to do. Sasuke was the most handsome man in the village; he could get almost anyone with just his glance...why had he come after her?

It was Friday morning and time to report in with Tsunade about this week's progress. She had only done three simple C-rank missions...it seemed a calm time for Konoha and she was getting tired of the boring missions. A difficult mission that could take her mind off of daily Konoha life would be greatly welcomed.

Unwillingly, Sakura threw off the covers and pushed herself out of bed. Surely the event with Sasuke bothered her still but she had learned to deal with it. He didn't succeed after all. Besides, she had a report to make before lunchtime. Receiving a new mission was causing anticipation within her...hopefully things would pick up again.

A warm shower put a calm to her thoughts. She got dressed in her normal red training dress and black shorts, feeling slightly refreshed. The crying she had done last night was long needed, and the confession. Unfortunately, she was nervous about running into Kakashi today. What would he think? What if he didn't keep her secret?

Sakura exited the front door of her apartment and absorbed the warm rays of sun that welcomed her. Breakfast was a necessity before she would get to work so she made her way quickly down the stairs and into her mother's kitchen without bothering to knock.

No one was up yet, not a surprise. The life of a ninja happened to be quite an early one. Opening the cabinets to find a less than satisfying selection, the pink haired ninja decided on cereal.

_Ah, the glamorous life of a Jounin! _

Taking her time on her breakfast, Sakura planned out her day. After the report she would probably get some lunch and then train for the remainder of the day unless Tsunade had something important for her to do. It was also Friday and she had no plans yet for the evening. Perhaps she would make a call upon Ino. All this time being spent with Naruto made her crave a little bit of girl talk.

* * *

"Frankly put, I'm a little bored. I'm a Jounin now and for the past month I've been given missions no different than when I was a Genin." Sakura directed the statement to the woman in front of her, the Hokage.

"Do you want Konoha to be peaceful, Sakura?"

"Yes, Tsunade, I do."

"Then do not complain over your missions as of late."

With a sigh Sakura admitted that the powerful woman was right. Peaceful time meant peaceful missions, she should be grateful.

"Sakura," Tsunade regained the young girl's attention, "there is something I would like you to do that requires great responsibility." The way the mission was introduced had Sakura excited.

"As you know, Sasuke is missing..."

_No... oh god no... _Sakura felt her body tense as a reaction and her hands visibly clenched at her sides...her eyes changed from a calming green to a furious expression.

"...and if he fell into the wrong hands another war could be started. This is an ANBU and Jounin rank mission so I will be sending an ANBU ranked individual with you. I have chosen you as leader of this mission for you know Uchiha Sasuke better than anyone in Konoha and would most likely have the greatest chance in succeeding. You will leave Monday morning."

Sakura remained silent for a short time, unable to think, speak, or move. "I cannot do that, Tsunade." The girl spoke softly.

"Why is this?"

"Because I do not want to find him! I do not want him in Konoha!" Sakura admitted.

"Can you elaborate as to why?" Tsunade looked at the girl curiously, wondering what must have happened between the two. The last time she had seen them Sakura was still head over heals for the boy. However, if there was a conflict between them, this might work out better than she had initially thought.

"No, I can not. All I can say is he left on his own will and will not accept a request to return."

"This is unacceptable Sakura. You will use all of your abilities, including your own charm, to return Uchiha Sasuke to Konoha." Tsunade made a note on the mission report in front of her, "You leave Monday at 7am. Kakashi will assist you."

"Please, Tsunade! Send someone else." Sakura pleaded to the older woman.

"You are a Jounin, accept your duties!" A stern voice was emitted from Tsunade, shocking Sakura slightly.

"Send Naruto, he knows Sasuke! They were best friends!" She was yelling now, still pleading.

"Sasuke doesn't love Naruto, he loves you."

"He doesn't love me, and I despise him." Sakura spoke frankly.

"I don't know what happened between you two, but you will put it behind you for the extent of this mission."

"He's dangerous!"

"Which is why he can not be let to fall into another countries hands."

There was no winning, Sakura realized. She was stuck on this mission and she knew that the Hokage was right with her explanations...Sasuke was best known by her, even if that wasn't saying much.

"Please rethink this, Hokage-sama." Sakura bowed politely to the woman and turned to make her leave from the room.

Upon exiting the room Sakura found Kakashi standing outside, waiting on her. It was a kind gesture on his part...he must have already received his mission. The memories of his words last night made her heart beat quicken, causing her to blush.

The silver-haired ANBU member was casually leaning up against the wall reading that damned perverted book he always carried around. _Shows where his mind stays..._Sakura thought.

"Kakashi, we leave Monday at 7am...or will you be late? Should we make it 9?" Sakura smirked at the man who hadn't even noticed her presence.

"What about noon?" He laughed sheepishly. Noted was the fact that Sakura had come out looking completely normal, all tension had subsided. He was expecting her to come out a nervous wreck at receiving her mission. The mission had been given to him by Tsunade earlier and he had remained faithful to Sakura and kept the true nature of Sasuke's disappearance to himself.

"Let's make it 8...so we won't be too off schedule."

"Ah." Kakashi muttered, agreeing. "Hey...Sakura, you ok?"

"I'm fine!" A quick smile flashed across Sakura's face. In truth Sakura didn't really feel fine, but she was stuck on this mission and might as well make the best of it. What had happened last night would become a one-time deal, she couldn't show such weakness...that was to be left for her Genin days.

Sakura looked out the window to her left and estimated it to be around one o'clock. The meeting had taken longer than she expected and she had missed lunch. This didn't upset her much because she still wasn't hungry... the best option would be to go ahead and start her daily training.

"Kakashi-sensei!"

The person in demand lifted his nose up from his book...barely. "Eh?"

"Would you like to spar with me? I'm getting tired of Naruto, I'm winning too much." She was being honest, at least.

"I'm sensing some strings attached to this...and I thought Jiraiya taught him better than that." Kakashi eyed the girl in front of him suspiciously.

"Well I've been training a lot since you left on all those missions..." She winked, "Let's just settle on if I win, I get to see your face." A teasing smile was flashed at the older man.

"Deal. You'll never win." Kakashi stood up straight, shoving his book in his pocket. "Where to?"

"The cherry blossom trees...it's so beautiful there." Sakura walked off and Kakashi quickly followed her, giving no objection.

As they walked, Sakura thought to herself the possible outcomes of the mission that lay before her. She didn't know how she would even get started because for one she didn't even know where to even start looking for Sasuke. What if he didn't want to see her? This was most likely the case too...and it wouldn't make the mission that easy.

It baffled Sakura as to why Tsunade chose to only send two ninjas on this mission to retrieve Sasuke. There were no leads at all and the likeliness of her or Kakashi picking up on one seemed slim. There had to be some sort of logic behind it, but Sakura definitely could not figure it out.

Sakura also thought of herself. The excitement of a new mission was sinking in, but then it was Sasuke...the turmoil of this mission would be good mental strengthening, she supposed. Not that she wanted to face it, but it might be inevitable.

If they managed to find Sasuke, Sakura decided she would treat it purely as a business matter and not let her pain show. On the other extreme, if they didn't find him, she could return to Konoha and continue a happy life without even thinking twice. She knew over this weekend she needed to prepare her emotions for this journey ahead. A true ninja did not let such petty things get in the way of their missions.

Tsunade assigned this mission so I would strengthen emotionally...I've always been weak with my emotions...

Suddenly, Sakura knew. Tsunade had assigned only her and Kakashi to this mission so it would be more likely that Sakura would have to face Sasuke head on. If there had been many Jounin around her, she could easily just stand in the background and observe everything. The only way Sakura would get something out of this mission is if she were the only one in control. The goal was to swallow her pride and find the man she now despised.

"Yo, Sakura. Are you there?" Kakashi leaned to poke Sakura lightly on the shoulder. They had reached the cherry blossom trees already and she seemed not to even realize it.

"Oh! I'm sorry, I was just thinking about how to start off the mission." The girl replied, blushing at being caught in such deep thought. She looked around and noticed they were already at the trees.

"Are you sure you are okay with this?" Kakashi spoke sincerely.

Smiling, Sakura replied, "I'm fine, sensei. I'm merely going to consider this emotional training! After all I believe that is why Tsunade didn't reassign me after my initial reaction."

"Good point, it might actually do some good. Cry-baby."

"Kakashi!!!" Playing as she was offended, Sakura took a step back and then did a double take to charge at him, starting the match.

Kakashi easily dodged and appeared behind her, "I was wondering when we were going to start, or if we were just gonna talk all day."

He slightly cupped his foot in around Sakura's, throwing her off balance. Reaching into his pocket he nudged Sakura with his elbow finally tripping her. She stumbled forward, noticing that he was exploring his pockets.

_Heh, a kunai match?_ She thought to herself then smiled, assuming Kakashi was going to take her seriously. Throwing her left hand down, she caught her balance and sprung back to her feet pulling out her kunai. She awaited Kakashi with anticipation.

"Ahh... what page was I on?" Kakashi amusingly comments as he flips through the pages of _Violent Sexy No Jutsu Paradise Vol. 2_.

Sakura's mouth dropped. _He pulled out that stupid book?! _Her grip on the kunai tightened fiercely as her anger rose. Quickly she threw her kunai at him followed by two more from her other hand. Kakashi effortlessly ducked out of the way only to catch Sakura's quick left foot as she attempted to kick him.

"Pervert!!" Sakura yelled.

"Heh, your speed has improved," Kakashi spoke without looking away from his book or acknowledging her accusation. This infuriated Sakura even more.

Sakura bent her knees in and threw her right hand in an uppercut motion towards Kakashi's book. He moved his hand and with Sakura's momentum she had built, she launched her right foot under Kakashi's chin, flipping herself, only to slightly graze the older man's face as he leaned back.

As she landed she saw that Kakashi only went back to reading his book, leaned back in the position he had left himself. Sakura knew that she could not beat him by rushing at him, he seemed to have a third eye watching her from somewhere while he read the perverted book. She grinned as a flawless solution came to mind.

Grinning to herself, Sakura reached into her pouch and threw a smoke bomb at her own feet. Kakashi only glanced at her and sighed. _What in bloody hell does she think she's doing?_

Suddenly, Sakura burst through the smoke with four kunai, two in each hand. With great force she threw two kunai at Kakashi forcing him to jump back. Following this, she aimed the other two kunai at his feet making him jump to his left. Just as he landed he moved his head to the motion at his feet and saw a kunai in the ground with a smoke bomb attached, followed by a loud blast as the bomb exploded.

The smoke cleared and Kakashi was still standing reading his book in his right hand, his left hand had predicted Sakura's movements and caught her in her stomach as she rushed at him. A look of great pain and question crossed Sakura's face.

_She may have gotten faster, but really that strategy could use some work. _Kakashi thought to himself. Perhaps he'd train her a little more. All of a sudden an unexpected kunai flashed to his right causing him to abruptly dodge. He regained his footing quickly and looked over at the Sakura he had stopped only to see a cloud of cherry blossom petals. _Ok well maybe I'm wrong. _He quickly moved his gaze to the right, taking in the sight of his former student. She was standing there with a smile on her face, giggling in pride of tripping him up. _How cute..._

Kakashi threw a look of puzzle in Sakura's direction, "I still dodged your Kunai, what are you giggling about?"

Sakura just continued to stand there smiling, not attempting a move in any direction. Her lack of movement puzzled Kakashi...until he heard a small crackling sound. A quick pain shot from his right hand as the book he was holding exploded, the pages flying into the wind and quickly turning to ash.

_That's what you get for being a pervert, Copy-Ninja Kakashi..._ Sakura thought as she stood there grinning.

A tear fell from the strong man's right eye. Kakashi screamed as he grabbed his hair in frustration, "My book... he was just about to..." Kakashi brought his face back up to glare at Sakura, showing an eye creased in anger.

_Oh shit, I didn't think he'd take it this bad!_ Sakura took a step back from the man, wondering what he could have in mind. _Though he does look kind of cute when he's angry..._

A blast sounded as Kakashi threw a smoke bomb at his own feet. Sakura looked at the smoke in anticipation and fear, unprepared for what she would see.

Bright blue streaks of light began gracing the clouds of smoke before the young girl.

"Chidori?" she gasped. "But no major Jutsu's are supposed to be used for...."

"Silence you fool!" Kakashi bellowed from the smoke. The smoke vanished as Kakashi charged from the smoke with his Chidori, his eyes locking with Sakura's in a fierce gaze.

Sakura prepared for the worst as Kakashi charged, nearly jumping out of her skin when she felt a tug at her right foot. _A hand?_ Within a moment the charging Kakashi vanished and in his place leaves fell. Sakura could feel her body being pulled into the ground, unable to make any move to stop it.

Suddenly she was let go and she fell backwards onto the grass. Kakashi appeared in front of her and pinned her down with force, "So..." he said smiling through his mask. "I believe you owe me a book."

"Like hell I do!" The girl yelled fiercely as she struggled to release her body from his grip.

"I win. No face for you."

"Let me up!" Sakura glared at the handsome man.

"I might as well, since in five minutes you destroyed my only dear possession!" Kakashi released his grip and stood over her. Sakura quickly shuffled to her feet, staring at him.

"That was uncalled for! You scared the shit out of me!" Yelling, she turned her back on him and began walking towards the town.

"And...?" Laughing softly, he watched the young woman gracefully walk away. It was odd but somehow he could read a pout in the way her hips swayed as she walked.

Sakura could feel his gaze on her, "Kakashi, I know you're looking at my ass."

"You planted a bomb in my book, I need something to occupy me." If only she had seen the expression under his mask...it would have given the fact away that he would have stared whether the book was gone or not.

"Pervert." Sakura said as she rose up her right hand in a wave.

Kakashi stood in the grove of cherry blossom trees, regretfully watching her walk away.

_Damn that girl..._

* * *

This chapter ended up being very long and not covering much time, so I will post Chapter 3 tomorrow so the storyline will advance more!

Please review and let me know if you're reading! The more readers I have the faster I'll write. ;)


	3. What Friends are For

I got this out later than expected because was down for a couple days and I took that as permission to slack off and read a bunch of fics! But man I really wanna hurry up and get to Chapter 10ish so I can write the part I am writing this entire fic for! I don't like writing this happy stuff o.O

Hitomi Brighteyes – You only think it does ;) Trust me, the review isn't accurate yet! Honestly, the review was very hard to write without giving away the plot ;; So it's a half-assed one…perhaps someone will think of something better.

* * *

Sakura and Ino looked at each other over a cup of coffee, wishing it had been a little bit more than coffee. The girls hadn't seen each other for a while, yet still they didn't have too much to update each other with.

"Sakura, when do you turn 20?" Ino just couldn't come out and ask when it was okay to drink booze.

"Just two weeks now…and I'll probably be gone on a mission for it." Sakura sighed into her cup; she wouldn't have minded a small celebration to mark her as an adult.

"Lucky! I still have another four months on me. I didn't realize you were older."

"Always have been, Ino." Sakura threw a wink at the girl across the table.

"So what mission is this? That's awful you will be gone. Maybe I can throw you a party when you get back."

"Top secret, Ino! But I'll be gone with Kakashi, so it won't be too desolate."

"You trust that old pervert enough to drink around him?" Ino asked in mock shock, teasing Sakura.

Sakura laughed, "Well he isn't Jiraiya, you know. And who said I was drinking?"

"Well it's your twentieth birthday! You have to drink. And who knows, he might be kind of sexy under that mask." An evil grin spread over Ino's face, "Oooh, Sakura-chan! Is he sexy? I bet you've seen him."

"Actually, I haven't seen him. I've tried everything short of seducing him and to no avail."

"You have to be kidding! You two are practically attached at the hip sometimes. Much closer than my sensei was." Ino raised an eyebrow, "Sakura…?"

"And what exactly are you insinuating?" Sakura glared slightly at Ino.

"For someone who got such great marks in school you certainly are dense!"

"Ino! Well it's better than you Miss I-can't-leave-for-training-without-wearing-slinky-lingerie!"

"Hey! I only did that because I was trying to capture someone's attention!"

"You did it for two years!"

"It didn't work anyway." Ino glanced down at the table, pouting.

"Eh?" Sakura asked, curiously.

"He went elsewhere."

"Well Ino, you can't make up your mind. I mean one minute you're in love with Sasuke…" Saying his name stung Sakura somewhat, but she did not make it noticeable, "and the next minute you are trying to seduce Shikamaru. He probably just isn't taking you seriously."

"I resent that. There is nothing wrong with having a backup plan!"

"Shikamaru was your back up plan? No wonder he didn't fall for it. You get yourself in over your head!"

"So how is training?" Ino purposely changed the subject. She didn't feel like being beaten down with honesty tonight.

Sakura ignored her as her eyes caught a figure walking through the doorway. Ino noticed her gaze and turned around to see Kakashi walking into the restaurant. She laughed quietly to herself as she waved to get his attention.

Smiling underneath his mask, Kakashi walked over to their table. He was meeting Genma for a drink but the other Jounin had not made his appearance yet. Obviously he had gathered Kakashi would be late, and decided to be later.

"Hello Ino, Sakura." He nodded to them.

"Have a seat, Kakashi!" Ino welcomed him, wrapping her foot around Kakashi's leg, pushing him in the direction to sit next to Sakura.

Sakura laughed as Kakashi seemed to fall back into the chair next to her. She hadn't seen Ino's feet at work.

Signaling the bartender, Kakashi ordered sake. He then looked curiously over at Ino, wondering what the girl was up to. He didn't know her well enough to figure out her intentions; he just knew she was quite popular with the men, even though she was still a Chuunin. Actually, it was probably _why_ she was still a Chuunin.

Ino leaned forward, batting her eyelashes and not so subtly giving Kakashi a divine view of her cleavage, "Kakashi-san…"

"Hm?" What in the earth could this girl be up to?

"That mask of yours, Kakashi…what would you take it off for?" A slight smirk turned her lips upwards.

He should have known, she was trying to use her charm for the mask. "Eating, drinking, shower…sometimes when I sleep."

Ino fumed inside from the bland answer. Sakura had been expecting such and just laughed. Kakashi was definitely the kind of guy who grew on you.

"I'm meeting Genma here for a drink," Kakashi admitted, "if that's not okay I can move."

"It's fine with me," Sakura smiled, "The more the merrier?"

"Something like that," Kakashi smirked.

"We were just talking about how Sakura's training was going! She wouldn't open her mouth though, do you know Kakashi?" Ino piped up, trying to get some dirt on the other girl.

Kakashi looked over at Sakura with a glare, "She's terrible."

"Kakashi!" Sakura reached up and smacked the back of his head.

"I beat her every time and her speed really is lacking. She should train harder…" Kakashi paused, thinking of something else witty to say to rile the girl up. She was so cute when she was angry. "Actually! Sakura, since your speed needs to improve, Gai would be the perfect sensei for you. I'll arrange something."

Inner Sakura screamed and ripped her hair out as Kakashi smiled innocently in her direction. She was getting ready to throw his wits right back at him when an attractive woman approached the table, brushing her hand across Kakashi's shoulder.

Sakura cleared her throat.

"Kakashi, dear. I've been wondering when I would see you again." The woman gave her sexiest smile to him. "I've missed you darling."

"Well I've been busy on missions, my dearest apologies." The tone of Kakashi's voice was deep and seductive.

Sakura noticed her fist was clenched at her side. Kakashi really _was_ a ladies man after all. Ino hadn't just been teasing.

"You have as many women as Ino has men!" Sakura spit out.

The woman looked at Kakashi in suspicion, "I need to be going, see you around dear." She walked out of the restaurant, not turning to look back.

Both Ino and Kakashi were glaring at the innocent appearing girl sharing the table with them.

"Sakura…" Kakashi spoke first.

"Pervert!" She proclaimed.

"Sakura!!!" Ino eyes could have burned a hole right through the girl across from her.

"I'm sorry, did I ruin your night of fun?" She grinned evilly at Kakashi, reaching into her pouch to pull out _Sexy no Jutsu Volume 3._

Ino looked at the two of them. Kakashi's glare had turned into a look of ecstasy. "Those two are weird…" she muttered under her breath.

"I suppose you would be wanting this." Sakura dangled the book by the front cover in front of Kakashi's eyes.

"Yes, I would…since you stole my last one!" Kakashi grabbed the book from the girl's hand.

Ino choked on the sip of coffee she was taking. This was way too much information for her.

"You're nothing but a dirty old pervert!" Sakura yelled at Kakashi.

"You're the one that stole my book!"

"I didn't steal it! I blew it up!"

"I think I may have come at a bad time…I'll be off now!" Genma had approached the table and quickly turned right back around.

"Genma! No! Stay, please?" Ino batted her eyelashes at the jounin when he turned back around. He shrugged and took the empty spot next to her.

Kakashi refused to admit what had happened today at training and as much as Sakura tried to explain he would deny it. After a while of listening to all the incessant rambling between the two, Genma decided to strike up a conversation with Ino and much to his surprise he found her to be a very attractive young woman.

Two bottles of sake later for the men and two more cups of coffee for the women, Sakura called it a night. Ino offered to walk with her home since they lived on neighboring streets.

The two men were alone when Genma spoke, "I haven't seen you tease anyone like that since—"

"I know." Kakashi abruptly cut him off before he could finish his sentence.

"What is up with you Kakashi?" He had to admit he found his friend's behavior somewhat odd. Especially odd in the fact that a woman had been staring at him from the bar all night long and he hadn't so much as even returned a glance.

The nice buzz Kakashi had from the sake was beginning to wear off so he explained to Genma that he was going to retire for the night, avoiding the question.

"Sure, whatever bud, but remember. Women are devils." A stern look came from Genma.

"They are, aren't they?"

* * *

Stopping in front of her home, Sakura noticed that her parent's light was still on in the main house. It was late for them, but she figured she better tell them about the mission before they made plans for her.

"Mom! Dad!" Sakura pulled open the door to see her parents fussing over her mothers sewing. Again! And how her mother had trained her father to do all the small work for her, she would never know.

"Sakura, sweetie! Hello." Sakura's father looked up from the pile of cloth on his lap.

"I just stopped by to tell you that I'll be leaving on a mission Monday morning, and I will probably be gone for two weeks or more." Two weeks was optimal, but she didn't want to worry her parents.

"Oh dear I hope it isn't dangerous." Sakura's mother looked at her worriedly.

So much for not worrying them.

"She's a ninja! She specializes in dangerous situations, Nodoka." Her father stood up for her.

"Yes, but still I can worry. What is the mission?"

Sakura moved to the table, pulling at a chair to sit in and facing it in her parent's direction. "Well, you know I can't tell you. But I just have to go find someone, is all." She trusted her parents not to gossip about her, so she would always let them in on the nature of the mission.

Nodoka sighed, "It's that Uchiha boy, isn't it?"

_Damn…_Sakura thought. How had she known? Sakura remained silent, she didn't really want to come out and say it.

"He's nothing but trouble for you, Sakura. I want you to be careful."

"It's okay mother. I'm not going alone, Kakashi will be with me." Sakura was reassuring herself as well as her mother. She trusted Kakashi…he had told her he would protect her.

"I don't want you coming home upset!"

"I won't be, mom! I'm over him and I was a long time ago."

"That is why I'm worried, Sakura." Nodoka knew her daughter well enough to know that something had been wrong for the past month. She had also heard around town that Sasuke had been missing for around that same amount of time. Two and two were put together rather easily. Sakura wasn't sad, though…she seemed bothered. So it definitely wasn't that she was sad because he was missing…she figured it was more like she was bothered by the reason he left.

"I'll be careful, I promise." Sakura stood and turned to walk to the door. "I'm feeling sleepy, I'm going to go up to my apartment!" She flashed a smile with her little white lie. She had had three cups of coffee, she was going to be wired all night. It was okay though, she had meant it this way. It gave her more time to think.

"We love you, dear! Make us proud!" Sakura's father beamed from his place next to his wife.

"I love you too." Sakura closed the door behind her, taking a breath of cool fresh air as she walked the stairs to her apartment. Looking up at the stars the memories of nights before consumed her.

"Please protect me…" she whispered as she fumbled for her keys and walked into her apartment.

* * *

I'm starting directly on Chapter 4. I don't know if it will be up tonight or tomorrow, but hopefully soon. I really want to get this plot up and going!

And if you are wondering how Kakashi drank his sake without taking his mask off… I can't figure that out either. Let's just say he's magic…he is Kakashi, after all.

Thanks for all your reviews  (Well I've only gotten 6 so far, lol. I hope more soon!)


	4. Hopes and Dreams

Yay! Plot begins and Elly is very happy and excited to write now! And yes, I know Sakura's birthday is inaccurate. My apologies but I didn't put two and two together until now ;

I wish I got more reviews, but I don't really know how to advertise my story even. Just stick it on ffnet and affnet. I posted it on a mailing list or two but they all seem completely dead and I could tell I got no hits from them. Speaking of mailing lists, I'm missing the good old days when GWML got started!! I fear those good days of fandom are over ;;

Any suggestions for advertising my fic? Thanks!

* * *

It was the same old bridge they had been meeting since she was first appointed a Genin. It was also the same old bridge that Kakashi had been late arriving to since she was first appointed a Genin. It was 9am, where was he? Even when she moved the time backwards he was late! Really now, she was fairly certain his only reason for doing it was to keep up his reputation.

The only thing the extra wait did was give Sakura even more time to think, and she didn't need that. The weekend had been pretty uneventful and it seemed like all she did was think and train. She had dinner with Naruto on Saturday and he was upset that she was leaving…he was more upset that he hadn't been assigned the mission though. Sakura simply told him that he had got to try to get Sasuke back the first time, and now it was her turn. She would gladly given up her position to him had she been able to.

With a poof Kakashi appeared next to Sakura. Judging by the suns position it was around 10am. Well it wasn't his worst…she had to admit that.

"Sorry, I overslept."

Sakura nearly choked, "Wow a logical excuse, the world may end."

Leaning over, Sakura grabbed the bag she had packed with her necessities and several changes of clothes. It wasn't too heavy, she hadn't required very much. Her usual training outfit would do most likely, but she did pack some clothes for a cooler climate. It was almost December after all.

"I figure we would stop at Otafuku first." He spoke, taking initiative in the mission. Sakura didn't argue as it matched up with her idea perfectly. Otafuku was a logical first stop. After all, the city was a hotspot for gambling, boozing, and underground crime. Sasuke might not have seemed the type but they were sure they could pick up some sort of leads. They highly doubted he had settled in a cabin on the countryside.

* * *

They traveled for hours in the treetops with only short rests. Nothing was really rushing them, but they didn't see any reason to make the trip to Otafuku leisurely either. They had made it many times before for various missions and it was nothing special anymore.

It was nearing around 6pm when Sakura felt as if she could not move any longer. The sun was beginning to set and they were still a good half-day from the city. She knew Kakashi could keep going but she didn't think she could last another half hour even if they slowed the pace. Her legs had began to hurt hours ago and at this point they were beginning to numb.

"Kakashi, can we stop for the night? It's beginning to grow dark." Sakura voiced over to her comrade.

He nodded in agreement. He had been waiting for her to say something; he was actually quite surprised that she had made it this far. His path changed directions as he lowered towards the ground to scout out a spot to build camp for the night. There was a river near by, he could hear it, and he made his way over.

Sakura nearly collapsed as she sat down on the forest floor. Her legs were so weak and she knew she had overdone it. Optimally she should have stopped over one hour ago.

Kakashi eyed the girl near him and noticed her obvious fatigue. He silently blamed himself for not checking her stamina as they were traveling. It had been a while since they had traveled such a distance together and last time she had only made it six hours before needing a lengthy rest. It had to be noted, however, that she had improved greatly in many areas from what he had witnessed.

After starting a fire and catching some rather skinny fish Kakashi settled down at the camp with Sakura. The weather was quite chilly once the sun set behind the forest, and Sakura unpacked the small blanket she had brought along with her. They both sat at the campfire in silence. Kakashi had been quiet today and Sakura could not gather why. Nothing had happened over the weekend and she couldn't possibly imagine that anything would be bothering him. She was probably just worrying too much…they were both just exhausted and that was that.

"Hey, Kakashi?" The quiet was killing her and she craved to strike up a conversation with the man across from her.

"Yes?" He looked up from the fire in her direction. She had wrapped the blanket around her with only her pink head of hair popping out of it. _How cute…_

"I know why you're always late."

Kakashi raised an eyebrow, wondering what had brought this topic up.

"You know you don't have to worry about your reputation with me."

He smiled. She had him figured out after all, "Maybe I'm trying to make an impression."

"I believe you had made one on me a while ago." She smiled in his direction, not understanding the true meaning of his statement. He just returned her smile, not taking the conversation any further.

Several minutes passed in more silence until Sakura spoke again, "Kakashi?"

"Hm?" He said, this time not looking up. The warmth on his face felt too good to sacrifice. A blanket had been one of the only things he forgot to pack.

"Have I changed?" Sakura asked him bluntly.

Well now he had to look up…she seemed to want a serious conversation, "Changed?"

"Just in general, have I changed? Not appearance…but me." Sakura spoke as she pulled the blanket in tighter around her. This was a product of all that time spent thinking over the weekend.

"All three of you changed. You've matured, Sakura. I think you left Naruto behind a few years ago in that department, even if he did improve some."

Sakura laughed, "I suppose I did."

"And there is no judging to what extent Sasuke has changed, since he seemed to quit speaking."

"He changed." Sakura replied.

"I don't see how he couldn't have." Kakashi mentally noted Sasuke's return from Orochimaru's and how different things had been since then. He could never tell what was going on in the boys mind since he was back. What he did to Sakura, though…Kakashi wouldn't have thought him capable of it.

"We've all changed. But still, there is something that bothers me." She made eye contact with the man across from her, noticing he was shivering slightly. _Ah, the fool didn't bring a blanket!_ She suddenly felt bad for him.

Kakashi didn't say anything in response…he politely waited for her to continue without edging her on. Sakura hadn't spoken seriously with him in a long while, not since she had become Jounin.

"Look at Naruto, he still dreams to be Hokage. Sasuke still dreams for revenge. Hinata and Neji dream for peace in their family. I mean, even Ino has dreams."

"Dreams are a common thing that drive us." He replied.

"Yes, but…" She remained silent for a few seconds, "I don't live for a dream anymore." Her voice was beginning to get a little weak as she made the confession. She didn't want to cry, she had promised herself that she wouldn't. "Back then I lived for Sasuke…he was my dream."

Another short period of silence passed between the two ninjas as the glow from the fire illuminated their surroundings in the dark of the night.

"But as I grew up I realized he wasn't worth my dream. Since then, I never found another. I don't dream for peace, I don't dream for a title. Everyone I know has a dream, yet I don't."

Kakashi was giving Sakura his full attention, yet he was still shivering from the cold. She nodded for him to move over to her and unwrapped herself from the blanket to make enough room for two. He obliged, scooting his way to the opposite side of the fire without standing. They sat close, their legs touching, and she covered the two of them with the blanket.

"I don't have a dream, either, Sakura." Kakashi admitted. The warmth was beginning to sink into him more and he fought the urge to move in closer to her.

"You don't?" She was surprised.

"All my dreams have been ripped away from me."

"How do you keep going? Why do you keep going?" Sakura could see the pain from his last statement turn into confidence as he spoke his reply.

"I may not have a dream, but I have a purpose. That purpose alone is enough for me to keep waking up everyday." He looked at her, his one visible eye turning up into a smile. "I said I would protect you, didn't I?"

Sakura was speechless. A slight skip in her heart was caused by his statement, making her feel dizzy. _He lives for me? No, I must be misunderstanding…_

Neither one of them spoke again…they didn't need to. Their friendship had an unbreakable bond after his admission. Sakura honestly didn't think Kakashi had been that alone. She had imagined him with many hopes and dreams, always surrounded by people to live and fight for. How ironic that in the end he had no hopes and no dreams…and his only reason for fighting was to protect his former student.

The two Jounins lay back on the forest floor, side by side, and let the night take them into sleep.

In sleep lay the only dreams they had.

* * *

They had woken up early, around daybreak, and packed up camp to move on. Sakura could now see the outline of Otafuku ahead. It would only be another hour of traveling and they could check into a nice hotel and have a nice warm lunch. They both felt refreshed from the sleep they had the night before. It had been the best sleep Sakura had had in weeks even if it had been on the cold forest floor. Neither mentioned the words that had passed between them the night before…but even still, Sakura felt a closer bond to her former sensei as they traveled this morning.

It was around noon when the two arrived at the gate to the city. They quickly passed the guards after showing their papers and headed straight to an inn. Tsunade had not made any reservations for them; she hadn't even made out a plan. She had simply handed them some funds and told them to use their intuition and do their best. There was no doubt that Tsunade was as lost as they were on where to find Sasuke.

Kakashi decided on an inn located in the heart of the nightlife district. Sakura would have preferred one a little bit away from all the nightlife, but she didn't complain. It was pertinent that they do everything they can to find information about Sasuke, and if staying in one of the busiest hotels in the city would help them, then they would do it. Higher traffic meant more chances to find leads.

The clerk at the desk was a busty blonde that eyed the couple, spending an obviously longer amount of time inspecting Kakashi.

"What? Are you trying to undress him?" Sakura snapped at the woman behind the desk. She found the woman downright blatant and rude.

Kakashi turned his head with a raised eyebrow to look at Sakura. He had known the woman was looking at him, but he hadn't expected Sakura to even pay any mind to it.

The woman tossed the keys on the desk and huffed at Sakura while turning her back and walking away to the back room. Kakashi grabbed the keys and lead the way to the two adjoining rooms he had checked for the both of them.

The rooms weren't too shabby. Sakura's had a window overlooking the busy street below and Kakashi's was no different. Each was furnished with a simple full sized bed and dresser. The closet space was lacking, but at least they didn't have to share a bathroom. Sakura had not stayed in many hotels with private bathrooms, she considered this a luxury!

Sakura unpacked her things as Kakashi did the same in the next room over. Once finished, she opened the door to the balcony that overlooked the street below. She was surprised to find that Kakashi and she shared a single balcony. The rooms were only two floors up, if somehow they managed to find trouble they could easily escape this way.

There was a click of the other balcony door opening as Kakashi stepped out to join Sakura. He observed their location and took the same mental notes as Sakura had.

"I suggest we go ahead and get started. It would probably be best for us to split up." Kakashi offered.

"Where she would start? And how should we go about doing this?"

"Well I brought two copies of photographs taken about a year ago, if someone has seen him then these should strike a memory." He reached into his vest pocket and pulled out a photograph to hand to Sakura. Without even looking at it, she shoved the photo in her pouch. She hadn't wanted to look at it…there wasn't a purpose yet.

Sakura had to be honest with herself and admit that she was slightly disappointed that they were splitting up so soon. She had traveled to this city before but she was nowhere close to knowing her way around. In worst-case scenario she could still handle herself if she found herself in a bad part of town…but she enjoyed Kakashi's company and was not ready to separate yet.

_This is a mission, Sakura! Not a vacation._ Her mind reminded her.

"Meet back for dinner?" Sakura suggested. "7pm?"

Kakashi nodded, "Yes, and we'll relax for the rest of the night. Now let's get going."

* * *

Sakura was on her way back to the hotel after six long hours of absolutely no progress. There had been a prostitute that had practically swooned at the photograph. The woman had even offered Sakura money to sleep with the guy in the photo. Sakura mentioned something about letting her fuck him for free if they ever found him.

The bars in this city opened their doors at noon, so Sakura had visited a few of them as well. No one hassled her for being under age, unlike they would have in Konoha. She had made her way into a few bars she would have been better off not visiting. At first appearance her leaf headband was not noticeable holding back her hair, and many took her to be a girl who didn't know any better. After being grabbed once by a drunken man she had broken his finger when he tried again. Needless to say the bartender wouldn't help her out in identifying the picture of Sasuke.

Sakura pulled open the door to her hotel room after fumbling in her pouch for the key. Kakashi was sitting on her bed waiting for her.

"Oh my god, you're on time." She playfully looked as if she were going to faint.

"What can I say? I'm trying to make an impression." Kakashi grinned at her under his mask. Sakura felt a blush rise to her cheeks and quickly turned her head so that he wouldn't notice. He still noticed, and his grin remained plastered on his face for a few seconds longer.

"Hungry?" He asked Sakura as she sat beside him.

Sakura nodded in affirmation and fell back on the bed. "Any luck on leads?"

"No, but there are still some places I would like to check later. Also I believe we should stay here at least through this weekend. I learned there was a festival in town. What about you?"

"Broke a mans finger, found a prostitute to fuck Sasuke when we find him, and found absolutely zero leads."

Kakashi laughed, "Sounds interesting. Tell me over dinner." He grabbed her hand and pulled her with him as he stood up.

They decided on a semi-nice looking restaurant near the hotel. Sakura ordered a dish of tako suno mono, an octopus and vinaigrette dish. Kakashi settled for some udon and over dinner they spoke of future plans in the mission.

It was decided that if after one week in Otafuku there were no leads, they would move to the next city over for a few days. As soon as they left the country they would need to be wary and possibly disguise their identities as ninja as to not arouse suspicion.

Following dinner they arrived back at the hotel. Kakashi had offered to show Sakura a bit of the nightlife but she had declined. She felt weary from the traveling they had done earlier. He admitted to weariness too and decided to retire at the same time as she. They would be in the city for a while, there would be plenty of time to live in the night when they were more rested.

The neon lights from the nightlife below made it quite difficult for Sakura to relax and drift off to sleep. Even after pulling the curtains tight she found the room still illuminated by the fluorescent pinks, greens, and blues. Every few seconds a scream or holler from the street below would invade her not so silent room. This would take some getting used to.

Sakura glanced at the clock next to her bed. 1am. She had been lying in the stiff bed for over three hours now without being able to sleep. It led her to think of many things and her thoughts not surprisingly eventually ended up on the things said last night.

_/I have a purpose._ _That purpose alone is enough for me to keep waking up everyday. I said I would protect you, didn't I?/_

His words echoed in her mind as she lay there staring at the wooden ceiling of the hotel room. No one had ever said anything like that before. Her parents had shown the normal love and affection but outside of her family no one ever considered her dear to them. She had held many dear, but all her efforts at building relationships were usually shot cold…mainly by Sasuke.

She hadn't even been trying with Kakashi. Not once had she pursued their friendship. She used to believe that it was necessary to do special things and to buy special gifts to maintain a friend's opinion of her…but she had not done that for Kakashi. She had not done that even once and he still thought more highly of her than anyone ever had before.

Her thoughts drifted from their friendship to his body…mainly his face. She may have put her curiosity aside for a few days, but it was definitely still there.

Tonight was one of those nights where her curiosity would get the best of her. Sakura removed her covers and stood up from her bed, quietly walking over to the door that connected their rooms. Ever so carefully she pushed the door open, not making one sound.

_Maybe he's sleeping without it._ Sakura grinned to herself in anticipation.

She tiptoed into his room after squeezing through the small crack she had made with the door. Making her way to the side of his bed she looked at his face…

…to see that dreadful mask.

Sakura silently cursed her luck and then decided her silent trip to his room was not all in vain. As she looked at his sleeping face she noticed how the neon lights fell on his sharp features. His arms were bare and rested above the covers…she took in the sight of the formed muscles with a breath.

_Wow…_

The way he looked right now….she had never looked at him like this before. Always it was as a superior, even though he was a friend. But they were of equal status now, both Jounins. Here he lay in front of her, completely vulnerable, his hair falling onto the pillow and over his eyes. His eyelashes were long and thick, she fought the urge to reach out and touch them. Sakura now realized why he was so popular with the ladies… laying like this he seemed almost irresistible.

"I knew I couldn't trust you – I had hunch you would come try to take advantage of me in my sleep." Kakashi slowly opened his eyes, smiling at her.

As shocked as she was at being caught, she couldn't speak. The red glow of his sharingan captured her attention and she found herself unable to break the gaze he held her with. She barely noticed as his hands grasp her sides and pulled her down onto the bed. She fell asleep there, looking into his eyes…not even knowing where she was. Gently, he took her small body into his firm but gentle arms and carried her back to her room.

Looking into his eyes there, she saw the cherry blossom trees. She saw herself smiling…dancing…with many dreams to live for.

* * *

It's so hard to stop writing! I want to keep going and going…but I have to set a stopping point somewhere or I'll end up writing throughout my classes, lol.

Thank you everyone for reading! Please review -v


	5. Bad Omen

1I had a question about Kakashi's age. Since Sakura is right now 19 that makes Kakashi about...does the math 33.

Again, thanks to my boyfriend for helping me out when I get stuck in plot :) He's my baby, even if he does look like Rock Lee. While I write this fic he's next to me playing Naruto 3 on Gamecube. I talked him into getting good with Kakashi, and I'm going to master Sakura. How sweet! I'm rambling! It's the wine, I swear it.

Thank you for the recommendations of turning off 'no anonymous reviews'! I hadn't known that was an option.

Oh, there is a lime flashback in the beginning of this chapter. Soooo if you don't want lime just skip to the end of the italics.

* * *

_He was on top of her before she was even awake. He leaned in closer and licked the innocent girls neck beneath him. She tasted sweet like a dark red apple. _

_The color of blood. _

_Sakura woke to an unexpected feeling of warmth and instantly panicked as she noticed a body on top of her. "Get off me!" _

_There was no way to tell who it was yet, as their was no moonlight on this dark night. She instinctively struggled to get her assailant off of her to no avail. _

"_Sakura...let's be together..." the man grabbed both her arms with his hands, restraining her, and kissed her hard on the lips as she continued her struggle for freedom. The kiss was not returned, and the man sat up and looked at her in puzzlement. _

_She recognized the dark and raspy voice,"Sasuke! What the hell are you doing?! Get off me!"_

_He came down once more to her neck and nibbled her soft skin. Sakura yelped a little in pain. She was stuck... he had her hands and her legs were captured beneath his. _

"_Sasuke, please! Stop this, I don't want it!" _

_Her plea was ignored. What was wrong with him this night? He didn't seem to be acting in character but lately he had been even more withdrawn than usual. She had feared him becoming unstable and perhaps he had finally crossed the line. _

_Sasuke continued playing his tongue across the girl's neck below him. Sakura felt as if she would vomit. The warm damp feeling traveling across her skin was supposed to bring on a feeling of passion, but he wouldn't stop...the fact that he was forcing himself upon her brought up feelings of disgust. _

_Sakura whimpered as an automatic reflex and Sasuke mistook this as a small moan of pleasure, lightening his grip on her arms. This gave Sakura an idea. As much as she didn't want to, if she played along, she could get in a position where escape was an option._

"_Oh Sasuke..." She moaned his name in fake ecstacy. Sasuke removed his arm from her right hand and placed it on her breast, massaging roughly. His mouth moved from her neck to her lips as he kissed her ferociously. Reluctantly Sakura returned his unwanted kiss. The taste of whiskey fell into her mouth as their tongues intertwined. _

_With her free arm Sakura quickly grabbed the kunai she had hidden under the side of her bedstand. In a flash she brought the kunai around to slash Sasuke's cheek and she felt blood fall on her chest. With a yell Sasuke brought his hands up to his injured cheek and Sakura took this split second of weakness to bring momentum into his legs and kick him off of her bed. _

_Quickly noting her surroundings she saw that the window was open, undoubtedly how he got in. She had no intentions of fighting Sasuke, whether he was drunk or not. She also had no intentions of staying and talking things out, incase he didn't have talking on his list of options tonight. She turned to jump out the window and felt a hand wrap around her leg._

"_You won't get away, this time, Sakura. You are mine tonight." _

Sakura awoke in a cold sweat. The memory often haunted her dreams but she knew it was just a normal process in recovery...but this night the dream had been different.

The night of the actual incident it had happened explicitly like she had dreamed, however, she had managed to escape via the window. Why the sudden change of events in her mind? She used all her knowledge of the human psyche to try to analyze the dream.

Immediately her mind turned to Kakashi.

_Why him? He said he would protect me from now on but that has nothing to do with that night! _

To first be able to properly analyze your subconscious thoughts, you must be able to look at your relationships with pure honesty. Sakura had a blind spot...she was not being honest.

The clock on her nightstand read 3am. It was Friday morning. The time spent looking for possible leads to the location of the Uchiha had passed very slowly. Most of the time she hadn't even seen Kakashi. They split their grounds up in such a way where they had advantages...for example Sakura went to the male bars where they seemed to kiss the ground she walked on, and Kakashi went to...well she didn't want to think about where he went. Another mental block.

The memory of Monday night ran a flutter through her chest. All she could remember was sneaking into Kakashi's room to hopefully catch a glimpse of his face as he slept. The next morning she awoke in her bed, not remembering how she got there. There was something different, though. When she awoke there was a feeling that had not been there before. It was as if her dreams had filled up her body and left her in complete relaxation. She had awoken with a sense of hope, and she had no idea where it had come from. Cherry blossoms were in her dreams.

With this thought her previous nightmare had been erased from her mind and she once again fell into a peaceful sleep.

* * *

It was the day of the festival. Kakashi and Sakura had been enjoying the festivities as well as semi-searching for leads on Sasuke. They were beginning to give up hope in this gambling city. Upon further exploration of the festival they discovered that there was a fighting tournament to be held in only a few hours. They didn't actually believe that Sasuke would be a part of it, but maybe he had picked a few fights. He was quick to lose his temper, after all.

The two ninjas had separated briefly...Kakashi had mumbled something under his breath and wandered off to leave Sakura alone in the shopping area of the festival. There were many things there that caught her interest, but perhaps her favorite thing was watching all the smiling faces as they joyously bought the items they desired.

"Mommy!" A young girl around the age of four pulled on her mother's pants leg, getting her attention.

"Yes?" The woman smiled down at the child.

"Isn't she beautiful?" The girl pointed at Sakura, causing her face to turn bright red. She smiled at the young girl and reached out to ruffle her hair.

"Thank you! But I think you are more beautiful than I am! I better watch out, you'll steal all my boyfriends." Sakura smiled at the little girl and laughed softly. The girl blushed and ran behind her mother's leg, peeking out slightly.

The mother smiled sweetly at Sakura and apologized for interrupting her. It hadn't been an interruption at all for Sakura…she enjoyed moments like these. There was something about children that made them so cheerful to be around. Maybe it was because she could so visibly remember herself being one. They had dreams.

Sakura continued walking, briefly looking at all the vendors that lined the streets. An old man from behind a table of jewelry called out for her attention.

"Oi! Such a beautiful lady! A beautiful lady deserves beautiful things! I have many of them for you!"

There was no doubt he said this to any woman walking by, but Sakura humored him and made her way over to the table. She had time to spare before the fighting tournament and looking at jewelry wasn't the worst thing in the world to keep her occupied.

The table was decorated with many pieces of crystal set into different styles of jewelry. Sakura skipped over the rings. A ring wasn't really the best thing for someone who enjoyed wielding kunai as much as she did. Instead she made her way over to the necklaces.

Sakura considered herself a woman, but she had yet to own one piece of jewelry. It was something she had always wanted but never really got around to it. There were other necessities in her life and she didn't really have the extra money to spend on frivolous items. Even though she lived with her parents they required her to pay rent every month because before she moved into the upstairs apartment they rented out for money to help them pay their own bills. She didn't mind, it was only fair.

A necklace that sparkled in the rays of the sun caught her eyes. It was a gold chain, unlike the others, which were silver. The crystal was carved in the shape of a snowflake and each edge seemed to catch a different ray, causing every color in the rainbow to be reflected. It was beautiful. Sakura reached out to touch it lightly with her fingers, contemplating a purchase.

"A beautiful necklace for a beautiful lady!" The old man smiled at her. "I'll even give you 10 off, it's a deal!"

Sakura took a glance at the price and her face grimaced. "Oh I'm so sorry, I'm afraid I can't afford it still."

"Well you should have your man buy it for you. That way you can remember him every time you look at it."

Sakura blushed, "Well I don't have a–"

Suddenly a hand reached around Sakura holding out some bills for the man to take, she heard a familiar deep gentle voice from behind her, "He's right, it would look beautiful on you."

"Kakashi." She turned her head to look at the man behind her. The necklace was so expensive! How could he afford it, she wondered.

Kakashi reached up to the necklace and unclasp it from the display. Sakura was looking at him with her large eyes full of surprise.

"Are you sure you can afford this? No one has ever bought anything like this for me..."

"Don't be silly. Consider this an apology for all those times that I beat you sparring." Kakashi wrapped the necklace around her neck. Sakura instinctively lifted up her hair so he could clasp the beautiful chain of crystal. The necklace fell right above her breasts and when she took in a breath the crystal rose and shone off an array of colors.

"Thank you." She turned to look at the tall man standing behind her. He had a look of warmth in his visible eye that seemed to melt into her. At that moment she was so thankful that their relationship had a chance to grow...as equals.

* * *

"Excuse me, I'm looking for a friend...he's been missing a while and he always loved these fighting tournaments. I was just wondering if you could look at a picture for me and see if you have seen him." Sakura smiled at the brute man in front of her. Innocence was her game in gaining information about Sasuke. These men had no idea that this little girl could actually give them a run for their money. 

"No, sorry. I don't think I know him."

The guy's partner peered in over his shoulder, "Hey! That looks like da fuck with da weird eyes that trashed Kuraiheya."

Sakura turned her attention to the man who spoke. He was a skinny hollowed out looking man who had scars running all the way down his arms. He didn't look like he could put up much of a fight. The circles under his eyes were either a sign of some sort of substance abuse or lack of sleep. "You've seen this man?!"

"He be lookin' a lot like the fella who fucked da place up. I wa'sin in my right mind really tho', if ya know whad I'm sayin'." The man paused, looking as if he was contemplating something, "But if ya friend has dese freaky red eyes then dis gotta be him!"

"Where is this place, can you tell me?" Sakura couldn't actually believe there was a lead. The man _had _to have been talking about Sasuke. He identified the pictures and even knew about the sharingan.

"You best not be goin' der on ya own, miss. Dis not a pretty place for an angel dat be lookin' like you." The look on his face said he wasn't kidding.

"I have someone I can take with me, a strong man."

"Well no comin' to blame me if ya get your pretty lil' head in trouble, now. Kuraiheya be at the very end of Peachtree Street. Don't let tha' name fool ya', dis not be dat peachy."

"Thank you! Good luck in your tournament!" Sakura smiled at the man and quickly ran off to find Kakashi and tell him the news. The last time she had seen him he was around the sign-up area, so that was her first destination. Upon reaching the area he saw him speaking with one of the men to be refereeing the tournament.

"Kakashi!"

Kakashi turned his head at the sound of his name being yelled over the voices in the crowd. He saw Sakura running towards him with her arms waving. He excused himself from his conversation with the referee and walked in her direction to meet her.

"Sakura." A smile crossed his face as he saw the necklace he had bought her hanging around her neck, bouncing as she ran.

"I found a man who mentioned seeing Sasuke at some bar called Kuraiheya. It had to have been Sasuke..."

"How do you know for certain it was him?" Kakashi had no reason to doubt the man either but they might as well make sure they had a positive lead before they left the tournament.

"He saw the sharingan."

"Sasuke...he's getting careless. Why does he have sharingan out at a bar?"

"Well you know how he loses his temper...apparently he trashed the place. The guy didn't tell me why; I don't think he even knew. But I got the location. It's not a friendly place and he warned me about going alone." Sakura paused, "I think we should go together, of course...just in case."

She was a little intimidated, honestly. Sure she was quick, agile, and an actual trained ninja...but these were shady, big, brute men. She reckoned that her fears were probably irrational but it never hurt to have someone there to watch your back.

"Of course I'll go. Wouldn't want your little pink head of hair to get dirty, would we?" Kakashi smiled beneath his mask and reached up his hand to pat her on the head. Sakura looked at him furiously.

"I could take care of myself, you know!"

"Well let's not find out, shall we? Now...we have a few hours before night, which is probably when we should go."

Sakura's stomach grumbled and she realized she hadn't eaten since breakfast. It was loud enough even for Kakashi to hear, and it made him laugh.

"Let's eat?"

Sakura blushed and nodded. The two headed out to find a simple café. They settled for the one they had been eating at their whole stay here in Otafuku. It was close to the hotel and the food wasn't that bad. Over dinner they began to discuss the lead Sakura had managed to find.

"Hey Kakashi..."

"Hm?" Kakashi was sitting there barely touching his rice while reading the latest pervert novel he managed to find at the festival. Sakura was still having such a hard time believing that Jiraiya was the one that wrote these! Of course she hadn't read a single one. Sakura had to admit she was quite guilty in this case of judging a book by its cover.

"Never mind, it's nothing really." Sakura hadn't meant to say his name. She was just thinking out loud.

Kakashi looked up at the small girl across from him, "Leading me on?"

Laughing, Sakura replied, "No. I was just going to ask you a question but even though I have it in my head and I know what I mean... I can't figure out how to put it in words."

"Huh?" Kakashi looked at her dumbly.

"It's more of a feeling than a question I think. And I can't really ask you about a feeling can I? I mean I can ask you directly about a feeling but not when I don't even know what it is or how it feels like."

"Did they put sake in your noodles?"

"Ok I'm going to shut my mouth now." Sakura felt stupid. She should never have spoken out loud, not that she had intended to in the first place. Sometimes her thoughts were all over the place and lately it was more so than usual. There were a few thoughts and feelings she had now that were always right there on the tip of her tongue that hadn't been there before. Of course she had been going through a lot lately and stress could do some very funny things.

Kakashi laughed, "I'm just teasing. I know exactly what you mean. What does it pertain to, at least?" He could not deny that new feelings had arose within him as well, but he was unsure if Sakura was speaking of the same ones.

"Finding Sasuke." Sakura bit her bottom lip when a small feeling of nervousness hit her. "I know I haven't talked about it, but in truth I don't want to find him."

"It's you're mission, Sakura."

"I know, that is why I'm here and that is why I told you about the lead. You have no idea how hard it was not to keep that lead to myself. I mean I don't want to see him at all. I don't see what good he does for Konoha."

"I think Konoha's primary concern is continuing the Uchiha bloodline and not letting Sasuke's genetic traits fall into the wrong hands. You remember what happened to Orochimaru."

"Maybe I'm biased, but I think it's bullshit. It's more trouble than it's worth to resurrect a clan with such an unstable person with such tremendous power."

"Maybe you're right. Who knows?" Kakashi looked back down at his book. He was at a good part; secretly he wished she would stop talking for a minute.

"I don't know what you see in those books! I swear those are more important to you than your country's affairs!" Sakura accused him as she saw his head sink into the pages.

"I'm a good part, quiet."

"What is it? Some kind of self-insertion bathhouse fantasy?" Sakura sarcastically made a remark about the author.

"Actually, no." Kakashi replied matter-of-factly.

"Then what is so great about this part you are reading?"

Kakashi looked up at her, his eye turned into what signified an evil grin under his mask, "You're in it." He knew this would hit a button and that was his entire purpose of doing it.

"What?!" Sakura jumped to her feet nearly knocking the table over in the process and attempted to grab at his book. She had no luck, Kakashi was too fast for her this time. It would be amazing if she could ever put her hands on that book again...he knew her motives.

"Well it's at this part where you are in the bath house and–"

"Oh my _God!!! _I'm going to _kill_ Jiraiya!" Sakura was furious. Kakashi had better have been kidding, if nothing else then for Jiraiya's sake.

"Actually, Naruto cowrote this one."

"Naruto...wrote...a...smutty...story...about...me..." Sakura's eyes appeared as if they were on fire, very similar to Rock Lee's when he expressed his love for his sensei.

"Lighten up, you aren't in this chapter. I was only teasing!" She was so cute when she was angry. He was so tempted to provoke her even more.

Hearing this she calmed down, now only mad at Kakashi for leading her on in such a way.

"You were in Chapter 3."

"Kakashi!!" This time, the dishes were knocked off the table.

* * *

The man was right, the bar called Kuraiheya really was in a bad part of town. There were hardly any street lamps even and the only lights that illuminated the street were from the run down brothels that appeared every other block. However, there was a small patch of neon light visible in the distance. Sakura and Kakashi gathered it lead to their destination. Still, what was Sasuke doing in this part of town? 

They reached the patch of neon lights and read 'Kuraiheya'. The street smelled of old vomit and liquor. She looked up at Kakashi worriedly and his one visible eye tightened in a smile to comfort her.

Stepping into the bar they noted that the bar was on their left and there was a small stage to their right with a dull silver pole. No music was playing even though there was a woman making her way onto the stage. The woman wore only a short skirt that hugged tightly to her hipbones. She had no extra weight on her and had not even bothered to apply makeup, showing the dark bags underneath her eyes. Her breasts sagged against her chest with no support.

Sakura gasped slightly when Kakashi grabbed her arm and pulled her to the bar, "You're staring." he whispered to her.

"Oh - I'm sorry." She replied quietly. This was all new to her. She hadn't visited many bars in her life previous to this mission. She wasn't even allowed in Konoha bars yet...well not for another five days.

The two took a seat at the bar. They had decided it would probably be best to not show themselves as ninja to avoid unwanted trouble. Sakura wore a simple red kimono style top with a pair of loose black pants. The crystal snowflake fell between her slightly showing cleavage, accenting it. Her pink head of hair had been brought up in a bun, held together by chopsticks.

Kakashi was in his normal black pants and a black shirt that seemed to fit him like a second skin. The sleeves were so short that they barely covered his ANBU tattoo. His muscles cut through the thin fabric, making it hard for Sakura not to stare. The way she looked at him had definitely changed on this journey. He wasn't the humble pervert teacher after all. He truly was a ladies man.

Kakashi ordered two shots of tequila and passed one of them over to Sakura. The glass was cloudy as if it hadn't been washed. Kakashi didn't seem to mind.

"Um, Kakashi... I've never actually drank before." Sakura said sheepishly.

"One shot will just make you warm. Besides, the bartender will be suspicious if you aren't here to drink."

She had to admit that he had a point. Looking around her she noticed that everyone had a drink…it was a bar after all. Sighing, she threw her head back with the shot of tequila, scowling at the bitter taste as it burned her throat.

"Eugh that was awful."

A small laugh escaped Kakashi's lips. "You get used to it, then you'll start craving it."

"I hope not." She said honestly.

"Well next time we'll get you something more...girly."

Sakura ignored this comment. He was obviously trying to frustrate her again but this was not the place for it. They had come here looking for a lead, not to drink. Once again Sakura explored her surroundings and noticed that a man was watching her from near the stage. Actually there was more than just one man looking at her. Besides the dancer on the stage she was the only female in the room.

"Sakura, you should go talk to that man. I saw him walking out of the back room. Can you handle yourself with him? He might could tell you something if you warm up to him." He gestured to the man sitting next to the stage.

Sakura nodded and reluctantly stood from her place at the bar to walk over to the man. He was older with graying hair and he looked as if he hadn't shaven in weeks. Dirt smeared his face and his clothes were tattered and worn. A stupid grin plastered on his face as he saw Sakura approaching him. She took the seat next to him.

"May I buy you a drink, miss? Not every night we get someone as pretty as you in this here trash." His breath stunk of substances Sakura did not even want to begin to try to identify.

She made sure to change her attitude. Miss polite ninja probably wouldn't work well with him and he would just end up getting suspicious. She flashed a seductive smile in his direction, "Scotch on the rocks."

The man obliged. Sakura remembered scotch as the drink Sasuke had liked. It should be fitting under the circumstances, she assumed.

"What brings you to this area of town? Your boyfriend didn't drag you down here...did he? I don't want no trouble if you be trying to make 'em jealous." The man eyed Sakura suspiciously.

"It's not like that. He has someone already..." Sakura lied through her teeth, "we accompanied each other here because we are looking for someone."

The scotch arrived and Sakura took her first sip, causing her to fight her reflexes to keep her face from twisting in disgust. Maybe Kakashi was right and she really _did_ need something girlier. The shot she had taken of tequila was beginning to warm her up.

"Who would that be, missy?"

"Well I overheard at the festival that he had been seen here in this place. I'm not sure when but I heard he caused a lot of trouble. He looks like this." Sakura pulled the picture out of her pocket and the man nodded his head in recognition.

"That's the fool that trashed the place about three weeks ago. Some stuck-up bloke tried to pick a fight with him. He had been comin' here nightly for about a week and never spoke a word to anyone. Peoples were suspicious, ya see. One of our other regulars finally tried to fuck with him and the guy just flipped without saying a word. He had these eyes...must be ninja. We don't like ninja here."

"Neither do I...which is why we're looking for him. He has something of mine that I want back." It was all a big lie but Sakura didn't care. The man was more likely to trust her if they held common views. Sakura tossed her head back and finished off the glass of scotch. She was starting to feel a little dizzy and she knew it must have been the alcohol.

"Do you know where he ran off to?" Sakura asked the man.

"Well I don't know but he sure as hell had to have left this town. You see the man he wrecked was the leader of one of the largest gangs here in the city. If that man as much as steps foot within the city walls again he'll have an assassin on his tail."

"Well I suppose that means we won't find him here. I appreciate your help, darling." Sakura leaned over and kissed the man on the cheek. She was disgusted.

"Be careful out there. He looks like he could snap you like a twig."

Sakura smiled and turned, wiping her lips off as she walked to Kakashi. Things were starting to get a little blurry...

"Anything?" Kakashi asked her when she came to stand next to him.

"Yeah, he's not in this city and won't be for a while. But no clue where else he could have gone." Sakura paused and swayed a little where she stood, "Can we go? I'm a little dizzy..."

Kakashi nodded and took her arm to help her walk. As they exited the bar Sakura turned her head to see a woman leaning up against the wall. Her skirt was ripped between her legs and almost showed off more than it should have. She didn't wear a top, just a ragged bra covered by a fake black leather jacket with the stuffing falling out of rips from the inside. A scar ran from her lip to her eye, distorting what perhaps was once a beautiful face. Without warning the woman leaned over and wretched into the sidewalk.

Sakura hadn't noticed but she had stopped walking to look at the woman in pity. What on earth could happen to someone to make them end up in a place like this? It was beyond her reasoning. How could this woman be happy here? If she tried hard enough there was surely a way to get out.

The woman looked up at Sakura with her hollowed out eyes and scowled, "What are you staring at, little blossom? It'll be you one day." The woman spit in Sakura's direction and Sakura's expression turned to fear and surprise.

"Sakura, let's go." Kakashi pulled her in closely as if he were protecting her and lead her in the direction of the hotel. There was something about that woman…Sakura didn't like it. She hurt inside.

* * *

Well that one was long. If any of you have ever been to Atlanta, GA you probably laughed at the Peachtree St. I had to stick a little inside joke in here somewhere! 

Thank you for all the wonderful reviews! You guys rock :D This is going way faster than I thought it would. I thought I would do one chapter a week…but it's been one week and I've already written 5! I wasn't as happy with this one because there wasn't as much tension. Next one, I promise :)


	6. Shimmer

Version 2 – I had a few errors so I edited some stuff.

Sorry for getting this one out so late… I blame it on my term paper on Schizophrenia and Counseling Techniques.

Thanks to the boyfriend for choreographing the fight scene for me!

* * *

I'm future-telling in this one a little bit about Kakashi's past. I'm too impatient to wait and see what it really is and well I don't think my readers would hang out that long either

A new day, a new country, and a new objective. All hope seemed to be lost when it pertained to locating Uchiha Sasuke. They had taken the small lead and left Otafuku but the city they had come to held not even one scent of the man. With no further leads this mission was a needle in a haystack. Kakashi and Sakura were still attempting to locate the Uchiha, however, their ambition was dying at the lack of action now. They were taking it easy.

Sakura's birthday was in two days. She would enter the world of being an adult in about 48 hours. It wasn't too significant to her. She had felt as if she were an adult for many years now. The things she had seen and the acts she had committed for her country were enough to make anyone grow up faster than usual. Her emotions responded to situations as if she were an adult already. Often times she wondered what it was like to be her age…being a ninja made it seem like she skipped her teenage years.

Sakura sighed as she pulled her hair back from her eyes. Kakashi and she had been sparing for hours and she was beginning to tire. Like usual, he didn't look the least bit phased for all he did was dodge.

She turned her eyes to Kakashi in admiration. He was resting under the shade of a tree on the edge of the forest. He was sitting casually, leaning against the trunk, reading his latest novel. There was something peaceful and serene about it and Sakura could not help but stare at him there.

Looking up from his novel, Kakashi smiled in Sakura's direction when he noticed her look. She took this as an invitation and made her way over to join him under the cool shade of the tree. At first she just stood next to him, feeling the breeze as it brushed her skin. She supposed they looked like quite a teacher and student pair there, at the side of the forest.

Sakura looked down as she felt a tug on her pants leg to see Kakashi motioning for her to sit down. She obliged and took a seat on the earth rather close to him. There was something odd about his reaction when she took her place, his aura changed in a way that made her feel more welcome at his side. Her presence seemed to make him evolve into relaxation.

Sakura inched closer to him so that her arm was touching his and their legs rested against each other. She could almost feel his body relax against hers and although his breathing did not change she swore she heard a small sigh.

There was something here between them. It was no longer a teacher and student relationship they shared. This mission may not have wielded significant results yet, but it had strengthened their friendship…their bond. It was one of those feelings that Sakura couldn't name. She was seeing him through new eyes.

Kakashi was a very attractive man, but Sakura would not let her fall victim to his looks. She had her guard up…it was apparent that women all over the country saw the same things as she in this man that was her former sensei.

"Hey, sensei."

Sakura hadn't called him that in weeks. He didn't turn his head to her as she spoke, instead he looked to the leaves above him, "Hm?"

"Don't use the same things on me as you have all of your women. I'm much more fragile." Sakura spoke in a calm voice. She valued their friendship and did not want to see it thrown away because she couldn't resist his charm…she had felt herself begin to fall and she was not feeling him resist in any way. His love for women was known among the Jounins. She didn't want to be another woman.

"You have my word." Kakashi replied softly, not emitting any signs of shock at her statement. He understood her.

Silence followed the two of them as they sat there leaning against each other. Kakashi continued reading his novel and Sakura just calmed herself into a meditative state, enjoying the feeling of being there.

After around one hour, Kakashi broke the silence. "I want to teach you a new Jutsu."

Sakura snapped out of her state and turned her head to look at him. He was still holding his book but he was not looking at the pages…his gaze was straightforward. She didn't respond.

"I'm no longer your teacher, I know. But humor me, I think you could put good use to it." His visible eye went soft as he made eye contact with her. He trusted her without any doubt. With a nod, Sakura agreed his offer.

Kakashi reached to his side to pull a small scroll out of his pouch. Quietly he unrolled the scroll to expose a list of signatures written in ink so dark of a red that it was almost brown. The last name read "Hatake Kakashi".

"This is a blood pact, Sakura. It's irreversible and signing your name here will create an unbreakable bond with the hounds. It's not very ladylike…but I'm serious about passing this skill down through you." Kakashi laid the scroll down on the ground before him, "So…" he continued, "If you want, I'm willing."

Sakura was flattered, to say the least. There were no other names she recognized on the pact and she gathered that the length of time between the signatures was very far. "I would feel honored to make this pact."

Kakashi reached to his leg and pulled a kunai from its holster, "Let me have your hand...trust me."

Sakura complied and held her hand out to her teacher. She prepared herself for the stick as Kakashi so gently held her hand in his.

"I'm sorry." He apologized as he brought the kunai to her finger to pierce the soft porcelain skin, causing crimson droplets begin to run down her hand. She didn't even flinch. He then gestured for her to sign her name on the pact.

The scroll felt rough beneath her wounded finger as she signed the pact offered before her. She felt important. Her Jutsu had always been exceptional but she had nothing to call her own. There was nothing to separate herself from the others she graduated the academy with. No special bloodline trait was found in her genes, and thought she was smarter than your average ninja, there were others smarter than her.

Once she was done, Kakashi took her hand once more and softly wiped off the blood with his shirt and then brought her fingers up to kiss them. Sakura felt herself float and ironically her pain instantly disappeared.

Kakashi stood, still holding her hand, and brought her up with him. They were standing so close; Sakura could feel his warm aura exuding from his body.

"Follow my hands." He commanded as he let go of her hand to show her one of the Jutsu to summon the hounds.

Sakura followed him and repeated the steps until she felt rather fluent and Kakashi nodded at her to try the summoning Jutsu seriously this time.

With all her concentration, Sakura pushed her will and chakra into the one place needed for this Jutsu. She had always had great control over her chakra and such a step in this Jutsu seemed almost elementary to her. Then quickly forming the seals she brought her thumb up to her mouth, tearing the skin with her teeth, and then shoved her hands violently at the ground.

"Summoning no Jutsu!"

With a poof, very similar to the one Kakashi was so fond of arriving with, a small brown dog appeared.

"Pakkun!" Sakura squealed delightfully at the sight of the pup she hadn't seen in so long, bringing her loose fists up to each sides of her wide smile.

"Well now, what a surprise. It's been a while Sakura, you've grown beautifully." Pakkun turned to look at Kakashi in obedience, who was standing behind Sakura with a look of pride, "and what can I do for you, Kakashi?"

Kakashi shook his head in a slow and languid motion, "She called you here, not I."

Pakkun returned the direction of his gaze back to Sakura, "I see…" he said someone hesitantly, "What can I do for you, Sakura?"

Sakura stood contemplating if there actually was anything the pup could do for her, then it struck her, "Do you sense Uchiha Sasuke at all?"

"No dear."

"Ah, well it was worth a shot. Forgive me, you are my practice for this Jutsu. I hope I didn't disturb you!" Sakura blushed slightly, turning her face away from the dog.

Pakkun once again looked at the man standing behind Sakura, "I was beginning to wonder when you would pass this Jutsu, Kakashi. I was afraid you might take us to the grave." Pakkun paused, "Forgive me for my bluntness, but what are your reasons for chosing Sakura? They will like to know." Pakkun was referring to the other hounds that were now at Sakura's call.

Kakashi stepped forward and came to a squat in front of Pakkun, petting him on the head, "She's my purpose, Pakkun. I want you to protect her when she calls. It is very important to me."

After his request Kakashi turned to Sakura and smiled his sweetest smile. Sakura felt her knees weaken in response to his expression. She wasn't sure that he meant it to have that effect on her, but never the less it did.

"On my honor, we will protect her with our lives." Pakkun spoke and quickly disappeared in the same way he had arrived.

Sakura felt warmth and trust in her former sensei. It was almost indescribable how honored she was at receiving such trust.

"Kakashi," her bright green eyes were still fixed on him even though he had his back turned to her, "Thank you for your trust."

He nodded, and began explaining the different hounds to her and what all abilities they could use. Then he stopped. There was one more thing he needed to say and he didn't even want to voice the possibility.

Sakura could tell his sudden change to seriousness and deep inside she knew what was coming. It was of no harm but the mention of it alone was like accepting the reality that every ninja tried their best to run from.

"If anything should happen to me…" he paused, realizing how realistic it actually was, "You must keep this scroll." He held up the pact in reference.

"I…I understand." She didn't want to talk of death for it was all too common.

"Now where was I?" As quickly as he had changed moods he switched them back again and dropped to a sitting position without even bothering to change his location. He picked up his novel from the forest floor and began reading where he left off.

Sakura smiled to herself, this is what she liked about Kakashi. He had the ability to be able to switch on his happiness at any moment and make those around him smile as well. It took a lot of strength at times, she knew.

"You're such a pervert." She laughed, not moving.

He didn't respond. He sat there pretending to read as he took in the feeling of her eyes boring into his back. His love crazy student had developed into a beautiful woman. A woman that anyone would have been proud to have at their side.

Time passed and they both sat there together quietly like they had been doing before. The more Sakura got to thinking the more she realized how relatively little she knew of Kakashi. She felt so close to him yet the only thing she knew of him is that he was a ANBU member and apparently he had graduated the academy at a very young age. He liked those perverted books, that was a fact…and he was a pretty decent, even if strict, teacher. She chuckled as she remembered Team 7's test to become Genin. It seemed so long ago.

"I want to know more about you." Sakura offered.

"There isn't much to know." Kakashi didn't even bother looking up from his book.

"That is a blatant lie and you know it. I've known you for eight years now and have yet to even see your face. Tell me something, anything. I don't care. Just tell me something I don't know. I'll return the favor."

"There's something about you that I don't know?" He asked her, suspiciously.

"Gotta be."

"Hmmm well how serious does mine have to be?"

"Well tell me about something that made you who you are…"

Kakashi paused briefly to think before he continued on, "It hurts to remember those things. You don't want to see that side of me."

"I've seen it. I see it all the time. You trust me so much with your hounds yet you can't tell me the least bit about yourself?" She was slightly accusing him now. She found herself offended that he didn't confide in her for personal matters.

"If it hurts too much, I'll drop it. I'm sorry." She smiled nervously, "Didn't mean to upset you." Sakura stood to her feet and began walking a line, pacing almost. Restlessness was starting to take her over.

Silence once more passed between them as Kakashi marked the page in his book and put it away in his pouch. He hadn't talked of himself for so long. The only ones who knew anything about his past were the ones who were actually a part of it…and most of those were dead. He didn't want to scare her. There were a million memories running through his mind that he could share with her, yet he didn't want to share a single one. They were memories that had been pushed into the depths of his mind and had a thick layer of dust he had to clear before they would resurface.

"I can't think of what I want to tell you." He spoke honestly.

Sakura had an idea of something he could tell her that wouldn't be too terribly painful for him, "Tell me why you wear that mask."

"I started wearing it when I was young and well… it just became a part of me." Easy enough, he supposed.

"I figured as much. Why did you start wearing it?"

"It's been so long I can't even remember clearly," he laughed, "I suppose it had something to do with me being so young at my level. I graduated early. I was taken more seriously if people couldn't see that I was actually still a kid."

"And you won't show me because…?" Sakura questioned.

"Because I like the games you play. It's like tradition now." His eye turned up into a smile as he looked at her.

"Why don't you show me, and then we'll pretend I didn't see it and I'll keep playing them." She returned his sly smile.

"Fat chance."

"It was worth a shot." Sakura shrugged and moved her attention back to the forest floor.

"Ok, now something about you."

"Everyone I know has had these terrible things happen to them, but honestly I feel like a rather lucky…but boring…person." Sakura sat down behind the peaceful man, her back pressed against his and her knees brought up to her chest in a tight hug. He felt content with just that small touch of her being there.

"You're far from boring. You keep an old man entertained."

Sakura never thought of him as old. He was in his 30s, she knew…"My entire life I've lived just normal. Look at all the great ninja, they weren't normal. Your life wasn't normal." It was that feeling again. That feeling that in the end she was nothing special.

"Sakura, let go."

"What?" Sakura looked at him in question, unsure of what he meant.

"Just let go. It's beautiful here, you know." His voice was calm and held great reassurance.

"Here…" she repeated to herself. She let her head fall back and rest on his shoulder, looking up at the sky. A sigh escaped Kakashi's covered lips as he felt more contact with the beautiful girl. Here…it wasn't obvious but Sakura knew the meaning. Here…it meant that mind state. That point of breakdown. In the end it wasn't that bad to just lose control and admit you don't know where you are going. It wasn't your past, it was the here and now.

"Here…" Sakura repeated in a whisper, watching the clouds roam overhead through the sky. They all had a destination, clouds and lives…they all moved in the same direction.

With a deep breath, Kakashi spoke, "Feel that?"

"What?" She felt a lot of things but which the older man was referring to was beyond her.

Taking another deep breath, Kakashi answered her, "That…breathing."

Closing her eyes, Sakura fell into the feeling of his back to hers and of their slight movement as they both inhaled and exhaled the cool winter air. It was almost as if she could try hard enough and feel the breath tickle across every inch of her body on the inside before it escaped her. She had never thought about breathing. It had never seemed so hopeful.

Kakashi closed his eyes as well and leaned back into her as she did him. His head fell back to rest on her shoulder and he turned his face to look at her. She did the same and they were facing each other…only an inch apart. They were so close and she could feel his warm breath over her eyes.

"Everyone takes that same breath…" he whispered, his eyes were caught on her lips and with all his might he tried but he just couldn't tear his sight away. They looked so inviting and at that moment he knew…he knew there was something there between them that hadn't been there before.

"Kakashi…" He felt each warm breath of his name brush across his face. She knew what he was trying to say. It didn't matter of your past; deep down you are still the same person no matter what happens to you. As long as you had a purpose, and as long as you let that drive you. It wasn't along the same lines as Neji's belief in fate…it seemed more spiritual.

Kakashi reached his hand up to run his fingers through the cherry blossom hair that fell over his chest. Sakura fell into his touch, savoring every moment of it. She could feel his breath getting heavier through his mask and he pushed himself against her back.

Suddenly, Sakura panicked. It was happening. She told herself she wouldn't let it happen, she wasn't another one of his women. He was her teacher and she didn't want to ruin this because he was so damned irresistible. He was her extremely supposedly handsome teacher with a love for perverted books and women. Without thinking much more about it she jerked her head off his shoulder and jumped to her feet, nearly causing him to fall backwards without her support.

"No, no, no, no!" A flustered Sakura exclaimed, looking down at Kakashi with a glare. Her finger had raised and was pointed at him, as if accusing him of something.

He smiled dumbly through the mask, moving his body around to face her.

"Quit before you're ahead!" She yelled at him with a voice that sounded completely unsure of what she should even be saying, "I'm not falling for it Hatake Kakashi! I refuse."

He had to admit to himself that he was doing something…but he was doing it because he wanted to. The feeling had come from her too. She was every little bit of a seductress as he was a seducer. He wasn't alone in playing this game and he knew it. The words she spoke, however, had truth. It wouldn't be worth it for a little tension relief that would just fade eventually on its own. It wouldn't be worth the repercussions if anyone found out, either.

Holding his hands in the air as he surrendering, he spoke, "You caught me, I'll quit."

"Good." She eyed him suspiciously, not completely believing him or even knowing if he had control over what was happening.

"So…Sakura-chan…" He nodded lazily to the clearing, "Ready to start your training again? You know…since I'm apparently still your teacher."

Sakura's blood boiled at his voicing of 'Sakura-chan', causing her cheeks to grow a deep red. She was blushing and she was furious at the same time. God, this man could so easily push her buttons with just the slightest bit of effort. "You have to stand up first, you lazy pervert!"

Kakashi slowly moved to his feet and looked at her with his visible eye. His posture was slouched, as always. How tall would he be if he stood proudly, she wondered.

"But you have to fight back, this time. No reading that damn book."

"Trust me, I learned my lesson…" He chuckled as she took her fighting stance.

Ready for action, Sakura charged at her former teacher, throwing two smoke bombs at his feet. Instinctively, Kakashi in turn threw a kunai into the cloud of smoke that bellowed before him. When the smoke began to clear he noticed a simple log with a kunai logged into the bark.

Sakura used her Jutsu to appear behind Kakashi and in a quick movement with her feet she swept his legs out from underneath him. _Step one, accomplished._ Sakura thought to herself.

Not expecting the sudden kick, Kakashi feel backwards and felt his back connect with the cold ground. It wasn't a very hard fall so he quickly moved to recover back to his feet. Propelling himself up from the ground he was shocked when his head came into contact with Sakura's warm leg, causing him to fall down again. _Step two._ She grinned.

Sakura had expected at least two seconds to pass before Kakashi made a recovery from the knee to the head. However, she had underestimated him. In surprising speed, Kakashi reached his arm out to grab Sakura's leg, pulling it towards him and causing her to nearly fall into a split.

With Sakura knocked off balance Kakashi took the cue and sprang to his feet. While Sakura was falling she quickly brought her other leg around and attempted to kick at him once more. In response, he dashed backwards with no problem.

Unable to save herself, Sakura fell to her back in the same spot Kakashi had. She quickly jumped up and sat in a squatting position, ready for an advance from the man.

An advance didn't come. Looking more carefully in front of her, Sakura noticed the man was no longer there. As she was turning her head around to check the area at her side she was tackled from behind.

With Sakura in his arms Kakashi brought them both to standing. Sakura braced herself to be thrown, but was surprised when nothing came. He just held her there in his arms, with her back to his chest. She could feel his labored breaths and her knees began to go weak in his firm grasp.

Kakashi grinned to himself, noticing the effect he had on the girl in his capture. Leaning over to where his masked lips were next to his ear, he whispered, "It feels so good to have you like this…"

Sakura was getting ready to say something in return when Kakashi's grip tightened on her. With no warning, Kakashi arched his back into a backbend, pulling Sakura over him in the process. Sakura's chest hit the cold ground with great force. The impact had knocked the breath out of her and she lay there gasping.

A tall figure stood over her, one leg on each side in a straddle. He placed his hands on his hips and smirked as he looked down at the breathless girl, "I take your breath away, don't I?"

"Kak…ashi… you…perv…" Sakura gasped between gulps of air while glaring at the man standing over her. She had a weakness, and as ninja do, Kakashi had exploited it fully.

* * *

They had returned to their rooms around six in the evening. It was time for another night of hide and go seek with Uchiha Sasuke. Just a few minutes ago was the first time Sakura had even thought of the boy all day long. Funny, it was supposed to be a mission about him too.

In accordance of taking the day off to train and spar, they decided to go out and look for leads at night. As usual they would start separate and probably meet up somewhere along the way and continue on together. This town wasn't nearly as busy as Otafuku but still there was enough to keep them busy for a few more days.

Sakura had decided first to try all the inns. She knew it was likely that he had stayed at one of them had he passed through here. She didn't feel hopeful, honestly. There were a number a ways he could have traveled after leaving Otafuku. They had chosen this one because it was closest. Tsunade had asked them to report back after about two weeks if there wasn't any significant information and it would be near those two weeks when they were done in this town.

It was so boring! This was the worst mission ever, she thought to herself. It felt more like a vacation than a mission…and really, this was a huge country. Had Sasuke _wanted_ to be found she was pretty sure he would have made himself known by now, or at least been careless enough to leave a few clues where he was going.

Sakura sighed, knowing deep down that she should have told Tsunade the events that lead to him fleeing Konoha. It was possible that she would have even called off the mission altogether and kept it at more of a casual search. Sakura cursed herself for not swallowing her pride and coming out with the truth. Tsunade would be upset with her for disclosing information, but she thought it would be best when they head back to Konoha at the end of the two weeks.

So far, Sakura had checked three inns. The clerks hadn't recognized the picture but they did tell her when the shift change would be so she could come back and ask again. She planned on doing that in the morning. There was only one more inn that she knew to check and it was on the other side of town. It was getting late, it would just have to wait until tomorrow.

With her stomach noticeably growling in hunger, Sakura stopped at a small bakery and purchased a slice of cake. Kakashi was nowhere near to scold her in her choice of dinners so she took full advantage of the opportunity. After quickly eating the cake in a not so very ladylike manner, she continued on her way back to the inn where she was staying.

There was a bar next to the inn and she knew Kakashi had been there last night after she had slept. She didn't know his business there but she figured it was just to pick up a drink. If there were women involved, which by the looks of the bar there were, she didn't want to know about it.

Sakura had to pass the said bar on the way back to the hotel and stopped in her tracks at what she saw. She could barely make out Kakashi's form on a stool with three rather attractive women surrounding him. Had she not been expecting to find him in a situation such as this, she would have never known it was him.

That bastard! I've got to stay away from him… 

Her mind told her one thing but there was something there that made her step into the door of the bar and inspect closer. Kakashi had his back turned to the door so she was in no fear of being discovered. Had he known she was here, he most definitely wouldn't be in such a flirtatious situation.

The girls around him laughed as Kakashi apparently said something humorous. Sakura could feel herself wanting to smack every one of them. How dare they!

"Aww…but you must be so handsome under that mask of yours. Are you sure you don't want to come with us?" One of the girls made her best pouting face as she positioned her chest with cleavage directly in the Jounin's eye site.

Sakura's fists clenched at her side as she watched the scene. _Kakasensei is going to go home with these women! He is such a damn—_

"I'm sorry, ladies." The corner of his visible eye turned up into what signified a smile, "I have my eyes set on someone else, I don't want to mess it up."

Sakura nearly tripped over the table in shock and had to reach out to hold the chair in front of her to keep her from falling. This man who had teased her all day long out of pure fun had just turned down three beautiful women with the excuse of there is someone else in his life.

Was she that someone?

Sakura frantically made her way out the door of the bar before he noticed her presence and briskly walked all the way to her hotel room. She unlocked the door and then threw herself onto her stiff bed, looking up at the ceiling.

_/I have my eyes set on someone else. I don't want to mess it up./_

Sakura's breath began to pick up as his voice rang in her mind. If he was talking about her, then that means he is serious. If he was so serious and determined how was she going to be able to escape his seduction?

Kakashi had far more experience in the art of seduction than she had. Honestly, she didn't even know what to watch out for. She was a virgin. Aside from the unpleasant incident with Sasuke, she didn't really know a thing about sex and seduction. Naruto and she had kissed once, but it was really just out of curiosity.

This couldn't happen. He used to be her teacher.

You think he's sexy, don't you? 

Inner Sakura spoke up, contradicting all of her thoughts. Deep down, she wanted him…but what about the consequences? A one night stand might be too much for her to take from someone who is so close to her. Could they ever go back to being teacher and student?

Thoughts were interrupted with the click of a door opening. It was the door that conjoined her room with Kakashi's. She didn't bother looking up, she knew by the sound of his gentle footsteps that he was walking towards her.

"I saw you running out of the bar." He spoke as he sat down on the bed next to her, causing the mattress to shift and her head to role to the side.

"You looked busy." She fumbled, hoping to work around the fact that she had heard his declaration. To avoid any unplanned contact, she raised her body up to sitting and turned to halfway face him. He was looking at her.

With that goddamn handsome stare he could do.

"Kakashi, I—"

"I wanted to say I'm sorry." He interrupted her before she could finish what she was about to say.

"Sorry?" She looked at him in question.

"I made you uncomfortable today."

Sakura could faintly smell some type of alcohol come from Kakashi's direction. He had come to her after drinking, how flattering. "No you didn't." She was being honest. The attention she had received today had been exhilarating.

Standing, Sakura moved over to where the older man sat on her bed. His hair was beginning to fall with the late hour and silver bangs fell into the area of his one visible eye. "Don't you ever get tired of this thing?" Sakura reached out to flick the headband that covered his sharingan eye.

"I don't have much of a choice." Kakashi's vision was beginning to make him slightly dizzy. He looked around him and stopped to think of what his reason for coming into her room was, other than the apology. He then realized he didn't have another reason.

"Take it off."

"Eh? You are trying to take advantage of me in my state?" Kakashi referred to the mask he was wearing.

"No, I won't touch the mask." She promised him. Actually, Sakura's only intention was to look into his eyes. Even in his semi-drunk state she wondered if she could look into his eyes and tell what it was that she was feeling.

"You don't remember what happened last time, do you?" Kakashi asked the small girl standing before him.

"Last time…?"

"The last time you looked into my eyes."

Sakura froze. She hadn't remembered anything at all. The only time she had seen his sharingan was in battle…she hadn't looked into his eyes then.

"Do you remember the cherry blossom trees?"

Cherry blossom trees…then it hit her. The night that she dreamed all those beautiful dreams… "I didn't know that was you…"

Kakashi turned his head to look at the sheets of her bed, which were tossed around in every direction, "You haven't been sleeping well, have you?"

"No…" she said softly, realizing what he was going to offer.

Kakashi reached up to slip his headband off, causing his silver hair to fall into his face. Sakura's breathing picked up slightly in awe at how beautiful he seemed to be.

Looking into his eyes to find out what she felt, wasn't working. _What a stupid idea…_she thought to herself.

"Kakashi, I don't want to—"

"I know." He interrupted her. "I'm not here for that."

She had her head turned to the side so she didn't have to look at his handsome face, even if it was still masked.

Gently, Kakashi reached out to brush the side of her cheek so that her face turned in his direction. His sharingan eye was closed. "I'll never take advantage of you like this, Sakura. I just want you to dream."

She nodded softly as he opened his sharingan eye. It was like a sudden feeling of warmth took over her body and no matter how hard she tried she could not break this look that bound them.

Suddenly, there they were. Back in Konoha…back in the cherry blossom grove. Sunlight hit her soft skin and looking down she noticed she was wearing the outfit like she was 12 years old again. Smiling, she looked up at Kakashi, who was standing a little bit away from her. His face looked younger as well.

"Remember eight years ago?" He asked her, and she nodded. "Dream of it, my blossom."

In the hotel room, their eyes were still locked into a deep gaze that brought the two together. Sakura had no sense of things around her. To her, they were in the grove…eight years ago. She had been so happy then…well she was still happy, but, she held dreams then. The one thing she wanted was a dream.

Kakashi gently grabbed her in her arms and laid her down in her bed. He was glad he could give this to her. It was already decided in his mind that he would not take the tension between them any further. What they had right now was a beautiful and trusting friendship, and he did not want to break that for her.

Kissing her forehead softly, Kakashi whispered, "Sweet dreams…my blossom."


	7. For Lack of Inhibitions

Bijoux- thanks for pointing that out in Chp 6, one of those silly little things I miss when I proofread. I went back and edited it (the version on ffnet)

This is the edited version of Chp7. Unedited can be found on affnet.

Warning! There are still Lime scenes in this version!

* * *

Sakura woke to the sound of Kakashi opening the curtains in her hotel room. Looking over at the clock she noted that it was an oddly early time for the lazy Jounin to be up. And why was he opening the curtains?

Noticing her rousing from the corner of his eye, Kakashi looked over at her and voiced, "It's snowing…we should get an early start before the city is shut down."

Today they had planned on checking the new shifts at the inns and heading to the inn in the more run down area of the town. His claim to get an early start made sense. At times he was so responsible and other times it was like he just forgot.

Sakura boosted herself up to sitting and brought her hands to rub the sleep from her eyes brought on by the night of deep slumber. She had been sleeping better since Kakashi had given her such beautiful dreams two nights ago. Looking at him, she smiled in memory.

"Snow, huh?" She hopped up on her knees to see if she could glance the dusting out of the window. To her surprise the snow had already fallen an inch deep and she realized how right Kakashi actually was about getting an early start. The snowflakes were huge and they stuck to everything they hit; within hours a white velvet blanket would cover the city.

She had always liked the snow, what a wonderful gift on this day. "Just in time for my birthday, you know?"

"Birthday?" Kakashi looked over at the girl, he hadn't realized it was her birthday already. Time seemed to fly when you were a lazy ninja.

"I'm 20 today, sensei! No longer your little girl." She laughed and threw herself up from the bed and bounced over to the window to get a better look at the weather. "I always loved the snow, what a coincidence."

"You should have told me, Sakura-_chan._" He emphasized the ending of her name and she playfully scowled at him in response.

She lifted the crystal snowflake necklace that fell underneath the t-shirt she slept in…she even wore it in her sleep. It was one of the most beautiful things anyone had gotten her and she never wanted to take it off, "Besides, you bought me this. It's more than enough."

"I'll take you out tonight, on me. You can drink legally now, after all." He laughed in a jokingly evil way. Drinking; one of his favourite pastimes.

"I don't know if I want to drink, Kakashi!" She spoke truthfully…the taste of alcohol from that one bar in Otafuku still haunted her. That and the feeling of dizziness it gave her wasn't the most desiring state of consciousness in the world.

"You just need a better environment. The bar next to the hotel isn't bad and it's not in a bad location with the snow and all…" He looked at her, daring her to come with him.

"Ok…" she gave in, "but just one drink. Ok?"

"Fair enough."

"…and I'm not paying!"

"Yah yah, no problem. On me, for your birthday." Kakashi began to walk to the door to his room before pausing and looking back at her over his shoulder, "Get dressed, will you? And put on something warm, I don't want to take care of you if you get sick."

Sakura sighed and playfully slammed the door after he walked through it. She may be 20 today but Kakashi still treated her like she was his responsibility at times!

"Hmph, don't want you to get sick…" Sakura mocked under her breath. Really, she was smart enough now to know what kind of clothes to put on. _Wait…I was smart enough when I was 12 too._ Oh well, some habits never died, she figured.

After dressing up warmly the two went out on the town to visit the inns together. Sakura dressed casually for the snow in a red knitted sweater and thick white pants. On her hands were white knitted mittens and Kakashi teased her about buying her matching earmuffs. She looked adorable, especially when she had to run back to the hotel room when she forgot her white scarf, which was knitted in the same fashion. Kakashi laughed and thought to himself what an innocent and home-style girl she was.

"Did your mom make all that for you?" He was half teasing her.

"Yes. Doesn't she do wonderfully?" Sakura skipped a few steps ahead and twirled around, walking backwards to look at him.

Kakashi laughed, "I was teasing…but hey, it's cute." He smiled at her as she looked at him, and his smile got wider as he noticed a rather large rock jutting out of the snow that she would undoubtedly trip over if she continued her task of walking backwards.

Sakura yelped as she lost her balance, thanks to the rock, and fell backwards into the snow with a soft thud.

"You sure are clumsy for a ninja." Kakashi stood there chuckling uncontrollably. It only made him laugh as her cheeks grew red in embarrassment.

Throwing a snowball and hitting him in the dead center of his face was an effective way of stopping the laughter, so Sakura went through with it. "I sure do have good aim, for a ninja." She stood back up and stuck her tongue out at the now rather snow covered man.

Kakashi looked at the girl through his lazy half shut eye and sighed as the cold snow melted to water on his warm skin. He should have dodged, but he wasn't expecting it. He could look forward to a nice wet mask for the rest of the day.

"You deserved it." Sakura pointed out to him.

"Eh, I know, I know." With a shrug Kakashi continued down the street, mentally trying to escape the fact that his nose was now _really_ cold thanks to the wet mask.

Sakura could not help but to let out a small giggle. He may have acted passive, but she knew she had gotten him. _Ah, but he deserved it, anyways!_ "You know you could just take that mask off if it's too cold now…"

"Hmph." He ignored her comment.

They continued walking down the snow-covered streets of the modest city. Each inn they came to they would stop and check for the change of shifts and see if anyone noticed the dark haired boy in their photograph. No one said anything significant, like usual.

It was starting to get cold…really cold. The snow was still showing no signs of ceasing in the slightest and the two Jounin's were starting to get chilled to the bone. It was almost over, for they had one inn left to check. Unfortunately, it was the inn on the other side of town.

The two carried on a conversation as they walked the distance to the final inn. A little talking seemed to keep them warmer and they talked about anything that happened to come to mind, including what it was like for Sakura to no longer be a teenager.

She had concluded that being an adult today was no different than being a teenager yesterday. She still felt the same, still had the same ideas, looked the same…there was nothing different.

Kakashi had nodded in agreement and mentioned to her that he never felt like a teenager in the first place. Major responsibilities for him had started much younger than Sakura's had. He admitted to his teenage years being a very tough time for him, and that they most likely were what shaped who he was today. He didn't go into any detail, much to Sakura's disappointment.

There weren't many others they passed walking down the snowy streets. People had chosen the right thing to do and that was stay inside with their families with the fires burning bright. Occasionally there would be a laughing child and his father, or brother…Sakura could not help but smile when she saw them for it brought back memories of her and her father when she was young.

When they arrived at the inn they noticed that it wasn't the best place, but it was nowhere near as bad as some of the areas in Otafuku. Sasuke could definitely afford the nicer hotels but as evident from his choice of bars he didn't want to be seen in the main crowd. As soon as they passed through the front doors a shady looking man sitting behind the clerk's desk welcomed them rather passively. He looked like he would rather be anywhere but there and didn't even bother raising his head when he spoke the greating.

"Excuse me," Sakura nodded to the man behind the desk, "We're trying to find someone, could you see if you could identify a photo for us?"

The old man humphed in annoyance and shrugged his shoulders, finally looking up and gesturing them over to the desk with a wrinkled and bony hand. Kakashi stood behind Sakura, standing guard. There may not have been a single thing to worry about but ninja always liked to cover all their bases.

Sakura held out the photograph to the man and he wearily took a look at it. The corners were starting to bend and there was a slight crease in it from being jammed into her pouch so many times, but still there was no denying it was the same old Uchiha Sasuke.

"Yah, I saw him a few days ago." The man replied and brushed them off, not offering any more information.

"Do you have any clue where he was headed?" Kakashi stepped forward when Sakura was too shocked to speak at the man's admission. Needless to say, they hadn't had the greatest hopes of finding anything in this town.

"Think he said he was headed for Konoha, where he was from, he said. I didn't talk to 'em much. He stayed here two nights, though, and he tipped me well."

"How long ago was it?"

"Two, three days maybe. Time passes so damn slowly in this season I don't even keep up with things"

"Did he sign a guest log?"

"Nah, he paid me extra to keep his damn name off of it." The old man paused, "Look I don't want to be in no trouble here, so don't report that I did that. Ok?"

"That won't be a problem. Did he say anything else?" Kakashi continued prying for information.

"No, he wasn't exactly the chatty type."

The two nodded and thanked the man for his information. What a coincidence, it was time to head back to Konoha anyway. There was a chance that he was already back and had checked in with Tsunade. It was decided they would head back in the direction of Konoha the second the snow let up. There was no traveling in this right now, not safely at least. They had found him, and they were pretty sure they knew where he was going, so it didn't rush them. He was going home, where they had to take him after all.

They walked back to the inn in mostly silence. Sakura's mood hadn't dropped at the realization that he was found but she was contemplating things, such as facing him again. She was unsure what on earth she would actually end up doing or saying when he stepped into her line of sight once more.

It would take someone as clueless as Naruto to not notice Sakura's inner turmoil written all over her face. Kakashi reached out his arm and rested his hand on her shoulder, leaving her a reassuring squeeze. "Don't worry about it, I'll be there with you when you see him again."

Sakura looked in his direction and smiled. The comfort and support her former sensei was offering her was just what she needed, "It's ok, I'm not really depressed about it anymore…it's just I'm a little confused."

That was a blatant lie. She wasn't a little bit confused, she was a whole lot confused…and not just about Sasuke. What was she to do when they went back to Konoha? Everyone would be expecting her to be exuberant with Sasuke's return and in all truth she was happier just spending time with Kakashi.

Kakashi was confusing her as well. They had been close companions for years but never before had it been as rough to control her emotions as it had been on this trip. She sensed the same thing from him, as well. She was positive it was nothing but the physiological act of hormones but if it was so hard on this mission then wouldn't spending more time with him when they were home make it even harder? Sakura could only hope it just faded with time. She needed his support when they returned…but maybe after things were settled again she should start spending more time with Naruto. _And start dating someone,_ she added in her mind.

The snow was still falling and the gray skies showed no sign of letting up. It was only around noon and the snow covering the grounds already amounted to six inches. The walk back to the inn was freezing both of them for the wind began to pick up and the snow was making its way inside of their boots.

Kakashi let her think on her own and didn't speak up anymore. When they finally returned to the hotel they decided to perch up in front of the fireplace in the main lobby to thaw their frigid skin out and dry their damp clothes. There was small heat supplied in the room but not near as intense as the flames dancing before them. Sakura sat there thinking, staring into the flames. Kakashi watched her, admiring every small move she made.

* * *

"Hey boss."

The man didn't look up but instead stopped sharpening his kunais to show his attention.

"Atsuo was right. That one pretty in pink is a beaut'." The old man snorted in his satirical appreciation. "Such a virgin, tho'."

"What did you tell them?"

"You were headin' to Konoha, left three days ago."

"Beautiful."

* * *

Sakura was stirred from her nap with a light knocking on the adjoining door. The first thing she noticed was that the room was dark…and absolutely _freezing_.

"Ready for that drink?" A soft and deep voice followed the knock and Sakura realized that Kakashi had let himself into her room.

"Oh my god… what time is it?" Sakura sat up from bed and rubbed her hands into her eyes. She was still wearing the same sweater she had on earlier that morning. Running her hand across her face she realized she had the imprint of the blanket she had been laying on across her cheek. Silently she thanked coincidence that it was dark now.

"Eight o'clock. You slept six hours, lazy. It's a good thing you turned 20 today because you will sure need that drink to go back to sleep." He teased her.

"What have you been doing all day?"

"Reading."

"You mean looking at perverted pictures…"

"That too." His voice held hints of a smirk crawling across his face.

"Well get out of here and let me get dressed, pervert."

"I'm not that bad am I?" He said as backing out of her room and grabbing the door to pull it shut.

"Yes, you are!" Sakura laughed and threw her feet over the corner of her bed. Leaning over to flip on the light she felt her muscles stretch after being so still for the past six hours. She had slept hard once again.

Sakura hadn't brought anything to really wear for a night on the town…not that this could be considered a night on the town. A hand knitted sweater and a loose pair of white pants wasn't exactly the proper outfit to wear to a bar, so she decided on something a little less warm. She had planned ahead and taken Ino's advice to bring at least a small skirt incase they decided to celebrate her birthday. She decided on a black button up dress shirt with long sleeves to wear for the top. Actually this outfit and the sweater were the only things she had brought that weren't considered a uniform. They dress shirt hugged her breasts rather suggestively and made her feel quite provocative. The top two buttons were left undone for an added effect. She wore her boots with the short skirt and in the end it looked rather cute. Her legs would be bare but it was assumed that most of their time would be spent in doors.

Extra attention was spent on tying her hair up with her leaf headband and for the first time in months she decided to apply a little makeup. She wasn't really trying to impress the man who was taking her out for her drink, but nevertheless she felt well rested and in quite a good mood.

Kakashi looked up from his novel when Sakura opened the door to walk into his room. She was absolutely baffled at how he could read those things for such an amount of time. Didn't they ever get boring?

"Ready!" She piped and hopped over to the man's resting place. Playfully she grabbed the sleeve of his shirt and pulled him up to standing.

"Eager?" He smirked at her energy.

"I've been sleeping for six hours, apparently. I have some energy to burn." She showed herself to the door leading outside.

"Ok, ok." Kakashi followed her. He admired how she had dressed and was unsure if he should mention anything or not. A faint hit of makeup was apparent and he couldn't help but wonder if she had applied it for him.

Once outside, Sakura shivered slightly when the cold air hit her bare legs and she could feel the goose bumps responding in an attempt to heat her up her body. The snow had begun to dust the floor outside of their rooms as it flew in under the ledge when the wind picked up. Sakura strained to see the top of the building across from them and estimated it to be about one foot deep.

The bar wasn't far and they didn't even have to go to the street to get there. The lobby of the inn was connected via a small glass door printed with the name of the bar. Sakura was pleased to find that it was just as sufficiently heated as the lobby, with a fireplace over in one of the back corners. There weren't that many others in there, just a few guests from the inn that had been snowed in. The atmosphere was merry and a player piano lent music to the warm air.

The bartender was female and she looked up in a warm smile as she saw the two walk in. She waved them over to the bar and introduced them to a pair of stools right near the fire.

"Why hello, Kakashi." She already knew what he wanted, the usual whiskey sour, "Who is this?"

Before Sakura had the chance to introduce herself, Kakashi spoke, "This is Sakura, we go way back. She turned the oh so lucky two-oh today so I brought her down for a drink."

"Beautiful. Do you know what you'd like, hun?" The bartender turned her head to Sakura.

Sakura shook her head affirming a no answer. "Something…not so bitter as scotch." She spoke with a nervous laugh.

"I'll get you something girly." The bartender flashed another smile and walked down to the opposite side of the bar to play with various bottles. A scowl crossed Sakura's face at the mention of a girly drink.

"Alright, little miss pink. Scowling at a girly drink just makes you a hypocrite." Kakashi leaned over and spoke into Sakura's ear.

Sakura glared at him and reached over to grab his glass, bringing it back and taking a big gulp of it. She nearly choked at the taste, "That is disgusting."

"You're not supposed to chug it…"

"Oh yes so I'll let it sit and rot my tongue off."

Kakashi sighed and playfully bapped the girl on the back of the head. He leaned over his glass to keep from looking at her in admiration. He had already noticed how the lights of the fire danced over her soft and pale skin. And that shirt was unbuttoned one too many buttons for his sake.

In need of conversation Kakashi brought up the one subject that probably should have been avoided, but it was bugging him to know, "How did you get over Sasuke?"

Sakura had just been handed her drink and decided to try a sip of it before responding. It was a cape cod and wasn't that bad, she could taste the cranberry juice very stoutly. "Well he left for Orochimaru, you know. I guess then I fell back on Naruto and he gave me what he needed."

Kakashi and Sakura had been close for many years now but she rarely ever mentioned Sasuke to him in that time. He usually thought nothing of it but lately he was beginning to remember how head of heals the girl used to be for him.

"—Not that Naruto and I had anything there, mind you. All I needed was a friend to be there for me." She smiled.

"Naruto told me he kissed you once." It was the truth and he decided to tease her about it.

"Ohhh that little brat."

"It's true." Kakashi looked at her with a small laugh.

"It wasn't like that! We were bored."

Kakashi bit his lip to keep from spitting out the one comment she was asking for, _Well are you bored now?_ He couldn't help but think it.

Time passed and Sakura decided she liked her drink so much that she ordered another one, unlike what she had said she would do earlier. Kakashi followed suit and helped himself to more of his drink as well. After the second cape code was down, Sakura began to feel that same warm feeling she had felt back when she was required to drink the scotch. One thing was different this time though; the feeling left her feeling good. She supposed it was the change in atmosphere. The urge to talk more was growing within her as well.

"Don't give me a hard time about kissing Naruto, you pervert." She poked Kakashi rather hard in the arm, "You've had so many girls you probably can't even name them all."

Kakashi was with her on the feeling warm part. The alcohol began its familiar effects on his body as soon as Sakura's had on hers. His drink was stouter, of course. "Can you blame me? And besides, you don't know that as a fact."

"I've observed it. You know every woman in Konoha."

"Ah." He smiled inside thinking of all the women who still did ask him for another date. It was flattering. He got around, but not as much lately. He just hadn't felt like it.

"I can't believe Tsunade assigned me on a duo mission with you." She was more talking to herself now, "I mean surely she knows your reputation and two weeks without your women you are bound to—"

"Flattering yourself, aren't you?"

"You are so frustrating!" Sakura waved at the bartender, "Another one please."

Sakura kept drinking for somewhere she hoped that the more she drank then the more she could forget about how handsome and smooth the man next to her actually was. It wasn't working…in fact it was having the opposite effect. The more tipsy she became the more sensitive she was to his every motion and she cursed herself for not stopping after the first drink.

"Quit doing that." She spoke to him.

"Doing what?"

"That thing with your hair." Kakashi had been tucking his silver strands away from his eye all night and the more he did it the more Sakura noticed how he softly shut his eye as his fingers brushed across his brow.

"What, this?" He tucked his hair behind his headband loosely again, just to spite her.

Without thinking, Sakura reached up and pulled the strand back down, "Just leave it there!"

_It looks sexier that way._

Inner Sakura spoke up, obviously feeling the alcohol as well.

"I'll be right back." Kakashi stood and made his way down to where the bartender was standing and leaned over the bar to whisper in her ear. Sakura could feel herself becoming a little jealous and she turned her head so she didn't have to see the two interact. Even over the sound of the piano she could hear the bartender's laughter as Kakashi spoke to her.

The tune on the piano ceased longer than usual and the next melody that began surprised Sakura. It was a song that she had claimed as her favourite years ago when she and Naruto had been on an undercover mission. She supposed Kakashi had heard her humming it several times before. Looking over in the bartender's direction she noticed that the woman was nowhere to be seen and Kakashi was heading back to their seats. In lack of proper inhibitions she jumped to her feet and walked over in front of the fire, farther from Kakashi and nearer to the piano.

With a puzzled look on his face Kakashi looked at her until he noticed what she was doing. As the melody of the piano picked up with a stronger beat Sakura's body begin to twist and turn like the dancing flames of the fire. Even though she did not sing it aloud, her lips were mouthing the words to the song that filled the air.

If I could die today, I'd be a happy phantom… 

_And I'll go wearing my naughties like a jewel. _

She laughed as she mouthed this line and began to sway her hips in beat with the music. Naruto and she had many nights of staying up dancing with the lady as she played this song on her old out of tune piano. They had stayed in her guest room for an undercover mission. The flood of memories left a nice feeling within her and she felt loose as if she didn't care if others watched her dance.

"Quit doing that." She felt a presence behind her and with the voice she knew it was Kakashi. Was she embarrassing him in front of his bartender? She really couldn't care less at this point. The feeling she had from the beverages made it easy to just change the subject in her mind. In reply, she completely ignored his request.

_Oh, the time is getting closer – Oh, the time to be a ghost. _

_Oh, everyday it's getting closer. _

The sun is getting dim, will we pay, for who we've been? 

"Quit doing that…" The voice repeated and she felt a rough hand slide onto her lightly covered hip and squeeze her in what she assumed was an attempt to get her to stop the movements. Kakashi's purpose, however, was just to feel her moving under his palm.

He could hardly take it. The alcohol had clouded his reasoning and increased his senses… her temptations were doing more to him than they usually would. Her body was moving in ways that if he thought hard enough about he could taste them…and feel them. That white skirt hugged her tightly, perhaps more than it should have and as she danced it began riding farther up her legs.

"You're tempting me Sakura…" His words were drowned out to her by her concentration on movements. No attempt was made to remove his hand from her; she actually found she liked it there. Her head was thrown back now with her hair flying around as she danced.

And if I see you will I wish I could come back…? 

_You've found a girl that you could truly love again. _

_Will you still call for me when she falls asleep…or do we soon forget the things we cannot see?_

With the last verse over, Sakura stopped her dancing and laughed out of exhilaration. She had begun to miss Naruto as the two weeks passed and the memories of him brought on by the music had made her feel at home. She barely noticed Kakashi as he pulled her closer to him and whispered in her ear, "I think we should go."

She nodded and followed him as he walked, talking about where she had learned that song. He wasn't responding and she didn't even notice, she was so swept away with the story that he wouldn't have had time to talk even if he wanted to. He lead her up the stairs in the lobby and back out into the cold of the ledge where their rooms were located.

Sakura giggled at a joke she had made when Kakashi brought them to a stop in front of her door. He had felt himself lose the angel on his shoulder that had given him points of reason before as he watched her dance. There was no longer that voice telling him that she was too innocent. There was no voice telling him about their age difference. In fact it was replaced with no voice at all and just pure instinct. He should have known it would come to this. Alcohol always lowered anyone's logic and caused lust to increase in any way shape or form possible. The drink was nothing but a tool to be able to act out what you really felt deep inside and have an excuse for it in the morning.

Sakura's laughter stopped as she saw Kakashi turn around and look at her in complete seriousness. His eye seemed to be on fire, and at first she thought he was furious with her. She couldn't figure out why, though. Sakura followed with her eyes as his hand slipped under the edge of the fabric that covered his face, capturing her eyes with his, and with one fluid motion he ripped it off the familiar area of skin.

There was no time to even comprehend the sight of the soft skin he had revealed, for his lips crashed into hers with such force she was almost taken off balance. At first she started to resist but Kakashi's hands wrapped around her in a way that said he wouldn't so easily let go. He pulled her in closer and squeezed her tightly to him, feeling her breasts press into his chest. All former thoughts of protest were wiped away as his tongue broke into her mouth.

He felt so warm…the innocent girl who usually blushed or ran away from such touch now could not find herself doing anything but returning the kiss he had so forced upon her. Their tongues intertwined, caressing each other's mouths and a small moan escaped Sakura, even though she had been trying to suppress it.

Sakura didn't know what to do and had it not been for the alcohol running through her veins she may have panicked and pushed away at the speed things were going. Instead, the lack of inhibitions caused by the drink helped guide her hands up to his shoulders and in a futile attempt tried to pull him even closer to her, even though it was not physically possible. It was the mental effect that had driven her to do it.

Kakashi responded by holding her tighter, his arms each wrapping around her so much that his hands were on her sides and he lifted her body up, her feet no longer touching the ground, as he twisted her around. Sakura felt her back hit the wall rather hard and a small breath escaped her throat involuntarily. In response to the extra support she brought her legs up and wrapped them around the man's waist. Her skirt was forced up above her hips and she could feel the cool air brush her upper thighs.

They had been waiting on this the whole mission. Since that night at the fire, Sakura supposed. The most enormous amount of tension was released with just this one kiss. The dreamy girl had expected to be satisfied after the kiss happened but she found that it only made her long for more and this time with every inch of her body.

The need to breathe caused Kakashi to regretfully pull back from the kiss. It had been so intense his head seemed to be even dizzier than it was before. It was what he wanted and she was accepting…in the end that was all that mattered.

His name escaped her lips and she brought her hands up to his head to pull him back to her lips. The wetness and warmth of each of their mouths collided once more in the flavor of vodka and fruits. This time Sakura was the one to take initiative and her tongue caressed the lower lip of the Jounin that held her captive, slowly breaking in to mix with his.

Their skin didn't take any notice to the cold winter air that surrounded them. They were putting out so much heat with their contact that the snow falling around them didn't even matter.

Sakura was pressed up against the door of her own hotel room and she felt Kakashi's arm travel down her back to the pouch that rested around her waist, fumbling for the key. His other arm held her tightly still pressed up against the door. He broke away from her kiss and used the slight moment of concentration he had to find the key and with great difficulty fit it into the lock of the door.

As soon as he twisted the handle of the door they both fell through into the heated room, their skin responding in thanks to the sudden warmth even though they consciously did not notice it. It was funny how warm the room seemed now and how cool it was earlier this day. Had alcohol not been consumed, Sakura would probably have had the reflexes to find her footing with the sudden lack of the door to prop her up, yet her reaction time was dampened. With a thud, she fell onto the floor, legs still wrapped around the strong man, pulling him with her.

It was dark in the room, and Sakura suddenly remembered that she had the opportunity to see the face she had been trying to catch a glimpse of for so many years. In a rather jerky motion Sakura pushed the heavy man off of her and scrambled to her feet. Kakashi looked at her in mild amusement as she ran to the nightstand to flip the light on.

"It's about damn time!" She proclaimed, turning back around to look at the man propping himself up on the floor with his arms.

He was beautiful. _He ripped it off for me… _

The site of his face gave Sakura one of those shivers that you can only get with the aid of alcohol and she felt every hair on her body raise up. She felt as if she would burst almost at the beauty in front of her. His skin was so soft, softer than hers maybe. There was not a single scar aside from the one on his eye. His half lidded eyes took on a new meaning with the whole of his face showing…instead of depicting laziness all of a sudden they showed strength, for his lips were slightly curved down in the same way and they complimented each other. His nose was perfectly shaped and turned up ever so slightly on the tip, making him look so young.

"It's not nice to stare." The gorgeous lips turned upwards in a smile and for the first time Sakura could see his true emotion written out like a story on his face.

"You look younger than me!" Sakura teased him, in shock at his youthful appearance.

Kakashi's lips turned farther up on the right side of his face, flexing the cheek muscle and closing the eye somewhat in a smirk. "Like what you see?"

The alcohol, honestly, was making Sakura a little more straightforward than she normally would have been and the words just seemed to fall out of her with no hesitation, "You're so damn hot."

The half lidded eyes suddenly widened in surprise at her words and Sakura realized what she had just said. In embarrassment she quickly brought her hands up to her now open mouth as she watched Kakashi laugh at her.

Kakashi boosted himself up from the floor rather quickly and with ease. With just a few steps he made his way over to the blushing girl and wrapped one arm around her waist, pulling her to him. With his other hand he played with the tie on her headband that held her hair back.

"So are you, Sakura-_chan_." With one quick movement his fingers pulled the knot of her headband loose, causing it to fall to the floor and her thick lustrous pink hair to fall into her face.

_Material removed due to restrictions on ffnet. Please follow link in profile for unedited version. 17 only please_

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* * *

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For those of you who skipped that scene, just know they didn't end up sleeping together…just other…stuff. However, they did fall asleep in each others arms!


	8. Standing Before you

A/N: What is the best partner to writing a fanfic? Wine, I tell you. Wine, wine, and more wine. Apart from that, anyone interested in being my beta-reader? I would like someone who could respond with corrections/suggestions within 24 hours of me finishing the chapter, has a good sense of humor, and likes long walks on the beach!

* * *

Sakura woke with the morning sun glaring through the window. There was something about this particular amount of sunlight that caused a searing pain to shoot through her head. The uncomfortable feeling didn't stop there, either. As quickly as possible it ran throughout her body and settled in her stomach, causing her to groan out loud from the nausea inflicted upon her.

It took a few moments for her thoughts to become conscious and the first thing she noticed was that she was lying above the covers on her hotel room bed - completely naked. The rush of memories she expected to flood back into her mind never came. She closed her eyes once more to shield herself from the pain of light and then groped around for the edge of a blanket to pull over her exposed body.

The memories were fuzzy and came to her in bits and pieces. Even though it made her stomach uneasy to think so hard when trying to recall the previous nights events, she did.

_Drinking, those silver strands of hair, the bartender..._

That much was clear to her. There was one other feeling that she couldn't seem to place with any of the situations she recalled.

_Warmth, soft, complete..._

The thought brought butterflies to her previously complaining stomach. That feeling was familiar - it was the same sensation that Kakashi made run through her on more than one occasion throughout this mission.

In sudden realization, Sakura bolted up to a sitting position, throwing the blanket to her lap. She remembered.

That kiss.

His face.

The desire.

Oh god, but what exactly happened? In her mind it was a blur of touches and whispers. Sakura found that even though this was unexpected, it wasn't unpleasant. The question of what all actually happened between them was fresh on her mind. Blood began to rush to her cheeks the more she thought of the possibilities.

It shouldn't have happened, whatever it was that actually _did_ happen. She had this sinking feeling that she had played right in his trap. To add to it all, she didn't know which bothered her more - the fact that he may have seduced her or the fact that even if he did, she didn't care. She had enjoyed it..at least she figured she had.

Weren't they supposed to leave this morning? Glancing at the clock Sakura noticed it was already 9am. And where exactly was the man she had so indulged in last night? There was no sign of him. Surely he hadn't returned to his room and left her to sleep alone. Suddenly she realized that what had happened between her and Sasuke weeks before had completely been wiped away with feelings for Kakashi and she smiled.

Sakura looked around her room and noticed that the clothes she had worn the night before were neatly folded and laid a top the table in the corner of her room. That certainly wasn't her doing. On her night stand was a half filled glass of water with three small white pills laying beside it. So, Kakashi had stayed here over the night after all, and he fully expected her to feel like shit in the morning. In the end he really was a smart man.

Sakura reached over to the night stand and threw her head back as she popped the pills into her dry mouth and chased them with room temperature water. It didn't settle well on her stomach but she had enough control to fight the reflexes of nausea. She was hoping that at least the water would wash the horrid stale taste that invaded her senses but it wasn't near enough.

After standing, Sakura made her way to her limited wardrobe and decided to wear her usual training dress, but the one with sleeves. Surely there must still be an enormous amount of snow outside. She made a note to hop over to Kakashi's room and steal one of his pullover shirts for extra warmth.

Sakura was expecting to see the previous nights makeup smeared all over her face when she rose up to look in the mirror. It might have actually been like that, but it wasn't at all what caught her eye when she spotted her reflection.

There, falling so lightly above her bare breasts was the crystal snowflake necklace...which was one thing she distinctly remembered not wearing to the bar last night.

He had found it, and placed it around her neck as she slept. What did that mean? It may have been a simple act but to Sakura it seemed immensely intimate.

"I really have to think..." She mumbled to herself while many thoughts ran through her confused and pained mind. There were too many gestures made by Kakashi that caused the events of last night to mean more than they should have.

* * *

Sakura stood there, in the midst of the flurries of snow falling on her rough but pale skin. No matter how much she trained in the daylight, her skin would never darken. It was ok, she didn't mind. He had told her she looked like a porcelain doll.

When you looked at a porcelain doll it had this effect over you…you would do anything just to be able to reach out and touch the smooth porcelain frame. The feeling of it is was a contradiction in itself, soft as silk and hard as glass. Porcelain dolls broke with so much as the wrong direction in touch. When broken, they could never be repaired without the harsh scars showing…making them appear as a piece of broken hope and lost beauty.

This place was beautiful, like that unbroken porcelain doll. The snow covered the ground and as she walked forward her feet left soft footprints that followed her to her destination. It was the spot in which they had trained earlier in the week. The sky was gray, but not a sullen one. In the distance there was a sign of the sun beginning to break through. It was the type of day that made you realize what beauty the world had.

As she moved forward she noticed a figure on a rock a short distance from where she was. Someone other than them knew of this place, she wasn't so surprised. It had been here for so long and for her to be the first one to come upon it seemed unlikely. She decided she would not disturb them, and instead continued to walk past, purposely stealthing her steps so she would not alert them.

Something was familiar, though. She stared at the figure as the snow rested upon it and decided to take a few steps closer just so she could make out the face.

_Kakashi…_

He was sitting there in front of her without even a clue of her presence. She decided to stay after all, just to watch him. She knew he would probably recognize her presence after a while, but she would deal with that later. She didn't even know how he would react.

It was too difficult to spot detail from this distance but Sakura could tell that he wasn't wearing the headband that usually covered his sharingan. In her mind she could imagine his sharingan staring out over the snow in deep thought. She wondered what the man in front of her was thinking. The jounin vest that he usually adorned was not there either, allowing her to make out his form more easily.

Bare strips of black could be seen under the snow as it dusted his body. It was apparent that he had not moved in a while. He sat there, completely still, staring…

_What is he thinking of?_

Looking at him there made her feel ecstatic but depressed…right but wrong…she was confused and the feeling it gave her she hated. She loved it too. Her mind would not think logically with this feeling, yet she could not imagine living without it there. It was as if she could burst, she didn't know how she would stay alive with such intensity.

_What are you doing to me…Kakashi…_

She had moved her gaze up to the sky, watching the snowflakes fall down to the cold ground beneath her. She did not notice that the figure vanished from the rock before her.

Suddenly, Sakura felt warmth at her neck and a firm hand was rested on her shoulder. It shocked her, jumping in reaction to the touch. She readied her body to turn and look at the man who had grabbed her, but she was stopped.

"Don't turn around." Kakashi's voice whispered softly into her ear.

"Kakashi…"

Each snowflake that hit her body was like a new sensation she had never felt before. His touch magnified her existence in the moment.

Unexpectedly Kakashi wrapped both arms around Sakura's chest and pulled her backwards into him, squeezing tightly to her warmth. Sakura drew her breath in sharply…she felt as if she would faint. It was overpowering her…she lacked the concentration to even see so she shut her eyes. Her arms rose from her side to place her hands on his as he held her from behind.

She could feel his warm breath tickle her ear, another feeling she couldn't concentrate on as it caused to many reactions from her body.

"Never change, Sakura…never change this." He pulled her in even closer, feeling her chest rise against his arms as her breath quickened at his request. He could not see her face but her eyes had opened quickly in surprise.

As soon as he had arrived at his place behind her, he left. Sakura quickly turned around at the loss of his presence. There was nothing where he stood but two footprints, it was empty. Her eyes scanned the entire area and she felt no other human presence. Unable to remain standing, she fell into the snow. The soft snow felt like ice as her knees pressed into it, but she didn't notice. This feeling…this feeling helped her to ignore all pain. Be it lust or desire, it was still a welcome thought.

* * *

It was purely physical. Well, maybe it was and maybe it wasn't but either way it sure as hell was supposed to be.

One thing was for certain and that was the fact that her emotions were getting the best of her and she wasn't paying proper attention to the mission when it should have been her primary concern. Then again, neither was Kakashi...the man was nowhere to be found after he vanished in the snow earlier.

She had settled in the lobby of the hotel in front of the fire with her bag packed and resting beside her. The crystal necklace made sporadic patterns on the wall as she toyed with it in her hands. The hotel room key had been handed in and she had only to wait on her partner, who was still nowhere to be found.

_He better not start this again...I was actually enjoying his punctuality for once._

Nearly an hour had passed before Kakashi graced the young woman with his presence. His bags were packed and quickly he laid the key in front of the clerk and tossed him some bills. He obviously didn't care if he overpaid, since it wasn't his money.

Sakura had never seen him access the room through this lobby...and then with second thought she realized that the great Copy Ninja Kakashi probably had numerous ways to return to his hotel room.

With a smile that was evident through his thin mask, he walked over to Sakura and leaned over to press his covered lips to her soft cheek. She could do nothing but return the warmth with a smile that was ever so sweet, but as soon as he took the seat beside her she began her inquisition.

"What happened last night? I know that... well... and I know we did... but I don't know..." She was blushing furiously and was too embarrassed to speak the words aloud.

"Don't worry..." He looked at her with a smirk. "You're still innocent."

Sakura let out a sigh of relief. She at least wanted to remember her first time.

"...sort of." He added quickly, with a small laugh.

"What?!?!"

"Well let us just say that I won't be needing that book for a while."

"Kakashi! You pervert!"

"Pervert? I'm not the one who started it, Miss. Oh-sensei-I-want-you-so-bad." Teasing her was one of his most favourite things to do because her look became so adorable with increased frustration.

"I did not say that." At that moment Sakura realized how much of a truth serum alcohol actually was.

Together they set out on the long road back to their hometown, teasing each other along the way just like before. The journey was expected to be rougher due to the winter weather and their time of traveling was significantly increased.

The sky had ceased sending it's snowflakes to the earth around noon and the sun began to peep through the last of the dismal clouds. The two ninja were happy to find out that the small town had been the hardest hit area, receiving almost a foot of snowfall. The closer they made it to Konoha, the less snow there was. They were traveling in about six inches of snow when they decided to rest for the night. The winds were picking up and Sakura could feel her cheeks chapping against the sharp cold bite.

They were both out of breath the second they stopped. Sakura had made it farther than Kakashi had expected in such extreme weather conditions. Her face was as red as the dress she wore underneath his oversized shirt. He smirked at the sight of her all worn out and in his clothes.

In fact, Sakura was so exhausted that when Kakashi prodded her to gather firewood she couldn't move. The girl sure had determination and that was a trait to take great pride in. In the end Kakashi prepared the fire himself as he let her rest against the cold bark of a tree. She was huddled up into a ball and shivering from the harsh air.

As soon as the fire was roaring, the older ninja took his place next to her and he pulled her in tightly to his chest. She was freezing and he was sure neither of them would mind sharing body heat. In response she looked up at him and smiled. It may have been an easy mission, but she was sure that it would not have gone as smoothly if he had not been with her.

"How much longer do you think we have?" Her voice came out slightly cracked from her dry throat.

"One day, at least. Depends on this damn weather." Kakashi rubbed his hands up and down the length of her arm to create warmth from the friction. Sakura didn't respond with further conversation, instead she just nodded.

The longer the silence grew, the more Kakashi found himself thinking. For the first time in almost his entire life, he had begun to think of his future. These thoughts had only come to him during the course of this mission. He didn't know what triggered them...he supposed he was just finally feeling his age. All the talk they had over hopes and dreams did no good for him when he realized that he did not even have a plan.

"Sakura, what should I make of myself?" He asked her for he knew how well she could hold up a semi-philosophical conversation from the last time they spoke over the fire.

"Haven't you already made it?" A soft voice responded in curiousity. She had believed him to be one of the best ninja in Konoha and he had already made quite the name for himself.

"No..."

"What do you mean, then?"

"Should I carry on my father's name or should I fight as a ninja until I die? I mean, I always just automatically assumed the latter one but I never stopped to think about it." There were pros and cons to both, he gathered. The pro involved with continuing as a full-time ninja was simply the fact that nothing would change.

"I can't give you the answer to that question. I just don't know."

"What about you? What do you want to do?"

"I don't know that either, I'm still young. I figure I have enough time to think about that later."

"I'm running out of time, I think." He sighed.

"Better think fast, old man." Her giggle was audible as she poked innocent fun at his age.

"I resent that." He shot her an amused look and then his face once more fell to seriousness, "I don't want to die yet."

"Then there is part of your answer as to what you want to do."

"...I'm too happy." At these words Sakura felt the familiar sensation of her stomach turning the pleasant flips and the small butterflies fluttering around. She wasn't quite sure what her reaction was telling her, but still it was very welcome.

"Still no dream?"

"No, just my purpose." He pulled her in closer to him in affirmation of his statement.

"Well I suppose you could keep track of what future you daydream about the most."

"Maybe...which do you think of most?"

"I think about you too damn much, sensei." She buried her head into the warmth of his chest and her hands made their way around his waist.

"Sakura..." He hadn't expected her to say that. He wasn't the least bit prepared for the conversation to take a turn such as this.

"This is just physical, right? It's just a normal fling, right?" She searched for assurance within his face as she caught his gaze with hers.

"I don't know…" He had intended it to be purely physical, but never before in his past relationships had he had that feeling deep in the pit of his stomach. The feeling that even the one night they had together could change his entire life. He seemed to ease his mind at the thought that their relationship just felt a little more intimate because of their past friendship and the tension they created.

Together they slept there under the newly emerging stars.

* * *

Konoha was in sight. The city gates were visible across the vast field that they stood in. It was also the field in which they had spent many days training as teacher and student. That time seemed so long ago to both of them.

"Are you ready?" Kakashi glanced over at his partner in slight concern.

"Ready for?" She had forgotten all about what had happened. Kakashi proved to be a true remedy after all!

"To see him. We haven't spoken of it lately."

"Ah. See, I forgot! So I guess that means I am." She laughed and brushed the subject away. In truth the memory did not leave her feeling sad or violated anymore...it just left her feeling a little bit angry, "You will be next to me, right?"

"Yes."

"Then you can hold me back when I attempt to kick his ass." A wave of confident laughter filled the air and Kakashi smiled. Unable to help himself he pulled her in for a kiss that was soft and sweet even with the separation of the mask.

"One more time." Reaching up, Sakura's fingers slipped beneath the edge of the fabric covering the handsome face and tugged it down to reveal his mysterious features. Instinctively Kakashi once more crashed his lips into hers. This time the kiss was more intense and it reminded them both of the desire shared between them.

"Keep your hands off me in public, Sakura-_chan_." It came out with an obvious amount of regret. Her head nodded, insinuating that she understood the consequences of others finding out about their physical relationship.

"I don't think it's me that you have to worry about... you are the one that can't restrain himself." While laughing at her own comment she tore herself away from him and ran towards the gates. Quickly he reacted and chased after her. If he could catch her then he planned on tossing her to the ground and torturing her right then and there...but alas she was faster than he expected on the last leg of the journey.

"Race ya." She spoke as she stopped in front of the gate with him only a few steps behind.


	9. Crimson Reunion

**Author's Note: **The angst begins. Just a warning…if sex, drugs, violence, rape, or anything even along those lines bother you…then consider the last chapter the end. You'll be much happier that way.

* * *

"There is something different about you, Kakashi." Tsunade spoke with her normal confidence while they waited for Sakura to attend the report. She had bumped into Ino along the way and he had left the two to their girlish jibber.

"Just tired, Hokage-sama."

"You are always tired, there is nothing new about that. Perhaps I can best identify your change as having a new energy about you." She looked at him inquisitively.

Kakashi shrugged, ignoring her statement. He was here to report on a mission, not talk about the changes in his aura. Tsunade always had a way for noticing things that everyone else seemed to be oblivious to – he couldn't stand it.

"Sorry!" Sakura came bounding into the room at that moment, sliding the door shut behind her. Just the way she carried herself showed that she was happier than when she had left. It didn't take Tsunade's intuition to notice it.

A faint smirk crossed the copy ninja's face as Sakura briefly caught eye contact. He had that feeling that this girl was just going to give it away. After she properly made her greeting they both began on their mission report. It hardly seemed worthy of an ANBU level, but there was good news and that was that Sasuke was heading back to Konoha.

The entire time Tsunade was slightly distracted by the realization that for once, Hatake Kakashi was on time…and his prodigy student was late.

* * *

After their extensive report to Tsunade, it was learned that neither hide nor hair of Sasuke had been seen in the city. At this realization, the regret of not staying away for longer crossed two identical minds. 

The cool night air hit Sakura's already chapped face with a shock. Kakashi, now returned to his stage of aloofness, turned his back to her and walked away with no word. He wasn't ignoring her, he was just attempting to act like his usual self and she knew men always went over board with that.

"Where are you off to?" Sakura smiled sheepishly in the direction of his fading back.

He turned back to her with a smile that was as soft as the freshly powdered snow they had frolicked in the day before. "I suppose Genma is expecting me for a drink. He has to have learned that I am back by now."

"Can we…?" She didn't need to finish the sentence for the man in front of her to understand what she meant. His hand rose without his conscious will and tucked a string of cherry hair behind her ear.

"I'd love to, Blossom…But not yet." An obvious look of disappointment crossed her face. "…I'll come see you if I can get rid of Genma…but no promises."

Sakura was satisfied enough with this and her warm smile expressed it. She was reassured time with Ino this way and she had missed her friend. "Well, at least walk me to the store."

"I think I can manage that…" Kakashi smirked as they both moved and began to walk side by side.

"Do you think he got caught up by the storm?" Sakura was curious. Sasuke was a strong person, perhaps stronger than both of them, and it was odd that he wouldn't have returned when he already had a head start.

"Yeah…" was mumbled in return. It didn't do much to satisfy Sakura's curiosity.

"So. Um. What will you and Genma do?"

This sported a laugh from the secretive man beside her, "Oh just what we usually do."

"And that is…" Sakura couldn't help it. She was being nosy and she damn well didn't care that she was, either.

"Drink. Talk. Laugh."

The topic was not any further addressed by Sakura. Truthfully, she knew the reputation of Kakashi and Genma with the women. All she wanted to do was make sure she could trust him…of course she was a little nervous about admitting that because she didn't want to scare him away either. So in the end she just kept her mouth shut. It was better that way.

Once in the store Sakura made her way back to pick out a bottle of white wine. It was much better than red, even though Ino didn't feel the same way. Oh well, she was treating so she got to make the decision.

Kakashi smirked, "So…what will you and Ino do?"

"Talk. Drink. Laugh." She said lightly as she shrugged her shoulders. It came off as sounding vague, which she meant it to.

He stopped there. She was getting ready to catch him. The worry of her not thinking it as serious as he did frightened him a little. What if he scared her off by coming off as restrictive? This is Sakura, there is nothing to worry about…is there?

_And Ino…_

Well shit. Ino was almost as bad of an influence as Genma. The two should probably hook up. That, however, could be saved for another night of stressing.

"Here is to a good night." Kakashi mumbled as he pushed Sakura lightly to the check out. She laughed and sent a wink in his direction, letting him know that she was onto him. There was a long night ahead.

* * *

_Rap, rap rap._ Shortly later Sakura found herself in Ino's doorway. 

"Sakura-chan!" Ino bounced happily as she opened the door. Her smile grew even wider when she saw the bottle in her hand. "White? Oh well, it's still wine. Come on, let's drink!"

Sakura was practically jerked through the door by her friend. Once inside, she made her way into the kitchen to locate two wine glasses. Unlike herself, Ino had moved away from her parents. Even though she still helped to run the flower shop, she said they simply 'disagreed' too much. Sakura figured it was more along the lines that they didn't approve of certain aspects of her lifestyle.

The apartment smelled of roses and there was a small hint of coffee, the exact scents that anyone would associate with Ino. The wildly eccentric but still elegant girl seemed to fit all of her stereotypes.

"Make yourself at home." Ino gestured to the small living room set before taking a seat on the sofa. Sakura handed her the glass of wine she had not sipped out of. The liquid was warm so she had thrown in several ice cubes. The only way to make this taste good would be to drink it before it melted.

An awkward silence filled the room as the two girls quickly sipped their wine. Sakura was completely distracted with improper thoughts of her former sensei. She was actually trying to fight them off, more or less.

"You aren't fooling me!" Ino exclaimed, shocking Sakura back into reality.

"Eh?" Should she hide it or should she tell Ino? One thing was for sure, Sakura knew she definitely wanted someone to talk to about it…but Ino had a big mouth.

"Spill the beans. We never have that weird silence shit. Now what has got you so distracted?" Ino paused and then her face lit up as if she had just realized the meaning of life, "It's Sasuke! You are excited that you will see Sasuke again!"

"No…! Sasuke isn't quite who I was thinking about."

"Well then…?"

Another two minutes of that damned silence and Sakura finally spoke up, "Ino, have you ever lust after someone?"

"Sasuke. So stay off."

"…Someone who returned it?"

"I'm not a virgin, if that is what you're asking." Another look of utter epiphany crossed Ino's face, "You did it!"

"No, that's not really what I'm asking." Sakura sighed. Why had she decided to try to talk to Ino? That girls mind was only on one thing 24/7…wait, but then again so was Sakura's. _Dammit._

"Then…?"

"What makes the difference between physical lust and an emotional connection?"

Ino raised an eyebrow. It wasn't what she had thought, but it would still be juicy. "Devotion, I guess. But I've never felt the need to be devoted, mind you."

"There can't be a physical devotion?"

"Well yeah I guess…but really if it were purely physical would you be worrying about it so much?" Ino's mouth rose up in a grin, "So you did it?"

"No! Dammit." Was Ino right? If she was then this was not going to be an easy situation to fix between her and Kakashi.

_Of course it's just physical. That feeling in your stomach, it's physical!_

Sakura did her best to comfort herself but to no avail. Even if it was non-emotional it was still too damn distracting.

"Tell me what happened." Ino prodded.

"Kakashi and I…well, we…" Stuttering at a time like this! Sakura felt like she was a Genin again. What a great impression.

"Hatake Kakashi! Sakura! You have to be kidding!" Ino had no idea how else to react to the news so she bolted up to standing and chugged the remainders of her wine. It looked quite silly.

"Well we didn't have…" _Wow I don't think I've even said this word out loud before… _"…sex." Ino watched her as she swallowed the lump that was growing in her throat, "Should we? I mean I want it just physical…I think…but…I don't want it to become more than it should!"

"So you want to know if I think you should sleep with him?"

"Next to you, he's my best friend…" It was Sakura's best attempt at reasoning with Ino.

"Would you fuck me?" It was what seemed like a random statement and Sakura reacted as it were such.

"God no!"

"Then don't fuck him either. There, problem solved."

"I'm being serious here…I can't quit thinking."

_Shut up Sakura! _Inner Sakura raged. It was physical dammit! Quit thinking.

"Ok, then why are you here? If you're so smitten with him then by all means go see him."

"He's out with friends. It's a secret, you know." Sakura smiled sheepishly and felt a small blush rise to her cheeks.

"Oh yeah, I guess that wouldn't go over so well with everyone…would it?" Ino laughed at the predicament her friend seemed to have gotten herself into.

A few moments of silence and Ino looked up from swirling her wineglass, she had moved to refill it earlier. "Can I ask you something?"

Sakura nodded in response.

"Are you not worried that it's gonna end and there goes your wonderful friendship?" A lost look covered Ino's face, showing to Sakura that Ino knew more about this feeling than she let on.

"I'm trying not to think about that…that's why I just want it to be physical."

"Physical or not, Baby. It's still going to hurt like a bitch."

* * *

It was nearly midnight. Sakura ended up listening Ino talk about Temari all night and what a 'little bitch' she was. The only fact to base this opinion on was the fact that she had just been asked out by Shikamaru. It was no wonder Ino had chosen to stay as Chuunin…her passion for love lives was much greater than her passion for war. 

Sakura was headed on her way to her apartment. The thought of maybe seeing Kakashi sent that silly little feeling in her stomach loose again. She realized that she just didn't feel like being alone tonight.

It was cold in the streets, but only a little. No one was left out this late at night, but she wasn't scared. She could do more than defend herself on her own. A street punk would not hold a chance against her even in her slightly dizzy state from the wine.

The scenario of her approaching Kakashi crossed over again and again in her mind and before she realized it, she was standing right in front of her parents' doorway. She hadn't had anything to eat, so she opted to grab a slice of bread from their kitchen before she did anything else.

Sakura's hand moved to grasp the doorknob and turned it to let herself in. A feeling hit her in her stomach but it flashed away before she could even figure out what the feeling was. Just a little something seemed to be thrown a tad bit off. Sakura stood in the doorway, fighting the urge to call out to her mother. Something wasn't right and the good choice would be to take precaution before announcing your presence. There was that feeling, but she couldn't name it even though it had come back. What a nasty feeling.

It was the smell that wasn't right. On a normal evening, the kitchen would smell of the leftovers from dinner or perhaps a batch of cookies. It didn't smell like that tonight. It smelled…sticky…sticky but not sweet.

Fear struck the kunoichi suddenly and she took in a deep breath waiting for her eyes to adjust to the light. They didn't. Why wasn't there light? There should have been light!

Another soft step into the room and Sakura's sandals made barely a whisper as they rubbed against the wood floor. Twisting slightly to the right should have brought some moonlight in from the cool night, but there were still only shadows. It almost seemed as if the darkness was an illusion. Another step was taken into the suddenly strange home.

Copper…no, why would the scent of copper be in this kitchen? No reason. She could barely pick it up with her sensitive nose but when she felt the sensation of a liquid beneath her shoes she knew. There was the source of the sticky smell.

Blood.

She couldn't see anything. The urge to scream aloud in panic was difficult to keep in, but Sakura managed. This could not be her parents' blood…! Her father was a trained ninja and not just anyone would be able to take him down. He was the strongest person in her eyes since she was born; he was supposed to be undefeatable. She turned around quickly to make for the door, deciding to retreat and at least find a source of light before finding out what was going on in her parents' home.

Blood splattered footsteps were not much for subtlety. Sakura could feel something there and she stopped immediately. _Whoosh._ Shit, whoever it was, they were behind her. With her greatest speed she tried to turn around in time to gauge her attacker and set up stance, but to no avail. A fist came into contact with her jaw and the force of it knocked her back, leaving a sting and ache over the entire side of her face. She attempted to scream but all that was emitted was a pitiful cough as a firm hand grabbed her throat roughly.

The hand that held her was strong and had the feeling of a man's. _Shit, he moves like he is ninja. _She couldn't breathe and as she fought to bring her own arms up to her attacker she felt her entire body go stiff. Another panic set in as she realized she could not move her limbs, it was a body bind jutsu. It would not be easy to break, if she even could. She had not known anyone to break out of them without the aid of another. Fuck. She couldn't move.

_Please come Kakashi. Please come…protect me like you said you would. I need you now…_It was merely a thought in her mind. There was no strength left to even say a word. It was drained so quickly! This man was so strong…she knew that she had never come face to face with such power before. Not good. _Oh Gods Kakashi…I need you now more than ever!_

Unable to turn her gaze she stared as the assailant's face became clear by a soft glow of light that was starting to surround them. The eyes that glared at her pulsed a vibrant red, no doubt the same shade as the blood that had been spilled that very evening.

"Sasuke…" Sakura spoke with the last remnants of her energy. She could do nothing as she felt his hand snake down her body, pausing just long enough to rip the buttons off of the shirt she wore. This was so horrifying…she could do nothing to stop the invasion…nothing at all!

The hand roamed more and suddenly Sakura was reminded of the night he left and she knew what he had planned.

"I've missed you, Sakura…"

* * *

**Author's Note: **Don't worry, I know that was one hell of a cliffhanger. But if it consoles you, I already have chapter 10 finished so it won't be another 2 months until I post again! Get ready for all that dark angst, sex, drugs, and rock and roll that I promised you.

Major thank yous go out to Ninjashen and Shirahime for beta reading this chapter. Ninjashin is helping me notice all my bad Southern phrases that I have become oblivious too **lol! **Don't let anyone fool you, too much of the south is a bad thing. I know…!


	10. Strangers

**Author's Note: **This chapter has a song weaved into it, as you will see. It's "Strangers" by Keane. Listening to this track wrote the whole chapter for me! Great song, but very sad. With that said, there is definite angst and are mentions of rape and violence in this chapter…and probably from here on out.

* * *

_"Honey, it'll be okay." The soft-spoken man looked down at his daughter. She was so beautiful and had been the pride of his and his wife's since the day she was born. Who would have ever known she would grow up to be such a fine woman?_

"_Daddy…?" Sakura opened her eyes to her father's voice. She was in the cherry blossom grove and the sky was as blue as the perfect summer day…but this wasn't summer. It was winter, it had just finished snowing…there should have been clouds…how odd. _

"_Don't worry about me, my little Blossom. Your mom and I…we'll be fine. We're happy." _

"_What are you talking about, dad?" Sakura moved her head to glance in every direction but she could not see her father anywhere. _

_A soft laugh was heard, "You can't see me. But don't panic, I'm here." _

"_What's going on?" She wasn't going to panic…this place was too comfortable to panic. It's as if the air she was breathing in had the power to relax her entire body. _

"_We aren't mad at you." _

"_I'm getting scared, dad…" As quickly as the feeling of comfort found her, it left. What was left was a feeling of pain and despair. Her chest hurt…panic began to set in as the blue sky above was covered by threatening black clouds. The air around her was suddenly still and warm as if were warning her of something._

"_It won't be easy. Don't lose yourself… We'll watch you, Sakura. We love you." _

"_DADDY!" She was starting to remember. That blood…it was… _

"_DADDY! Come back! DADDY WHERE ARE YOU!" Panic set in and very soon the world around her faded to black._

_

* * *

_  
"TSUNADE!" This was no time to be proper. Naruto stormed through the medical hallways with Sakura's limp body in his arms. He had not even bothered to grab a wrap for her nude skin. There just wasn't enough time. Blood dripped with each step he took as if it were needed to leave their trail.

Finally he found her. Looking up at them she panicked but there was a reason she had been appointed Hokage…and that is even in those 'bad dream' type situations she could still function to perfection.

This wasn't good. She was broken, bleeding, and bruised. Tsunade quickly but carefully took Sakura from the shock-stricken ninja and turned briskly to run to the surgery rooms. "What the hell happened!"

"I don't know!" Naruto was getting winded , but he didn't even care. _Sakura…oh my god, Sakura! _There were too many thoughts and panics floating through his mind. "I found her like this, outside her home. She had crawled into the street… Oh god there was so much blood, Tsunade. Not just hers."

They were there. Tsunade placed Sakura on the examination bed and began to quickly scout over her naked form for the place where the injury was worst. It was everywhere, though, and quickly she discerned that her best bet was to concentrate on the body as a whole. The only laceration was a smooth straight line dug deep into her flesh from her bottom lip to the area between her legs. From first glance it appeared to run a half an inch deep at the worst parts. It would leave a scar, there was nothing she could do about that…but scars were the least of her concern.

Sakura's arm was broken. It fell on the table twisted in an odd manor with the elbow bent in the wrong direction. Bruises covered all her body and her lips were busted in more than one place. An eye swollen shut, hair ripped out, fingers bent in odd directions…this wasn't good at all. Tsunade could sense internal bleeding.

Tsunade concentrated as she began her flow of chakra into the ripped body lying before her. "Oh god, please make it…"

* * *

"Where is she!" Kakashi slammed his hands on Tsunade's desk, demanding a quick answer. Rainwater dripped from his wild silver hair to the papers on her desk but he didn't seem to care. 

"Sit down." Tsunade didn't make eye contact…she couldn't. It felt too hard to admit what happened to Sakura. She made it through, but it was still bad. Her body would heal with scarring…but mentally Tsunade didn't even have an estimate.

Kakashi did as told and took his seat. His hands were getting sweaty and the whole room felt as if it were closing in on him. All he had gotten from Naruto was a claim that Sakura was hurt and in the medic building on floor two. He had rushed straight here at a speed that even would have had made his father proud. Where was she! He had to see her! His eyes bore into Tsunade as she took her time.

"We almost lost her." It finally came through. She didn't want to tell him! Seeing Hatake Kakashi cry, which he most likely would, was enough to make anyone feel unsure about themselves.

"…It's that bad?" Reality always has a habit of hitting you right in the stomach. A broken leg perhaps, or a kunai wound…that is what he had been expecting. Something she had gotten during sparring with Naruto, maybe. Kakashi's voice fell soft, "What happened, Hokage-sama?"

"She…Kakashi first I must know what is going on between you two, just so I can feel more comfortable dealing this news." It wasn't that she wouldn't tell him had he said there was nothing between them, but she wanted to deliver it softer if he possibly had feelings for her.

"More than friends, less than a couple." It was easier that he thought, admitting their relationship. The definition fit, more or less.

Tsunade still hesitated, he didn't sound sure. "Are you sure you weren't just more than a couple?"

"Fuck, Tsunade. Just tell me what the hell happened and where in this fucking morgue is she!" This was no time to play therapist. He wanted to know, and he wanted to know now.

Almost whispering Tsunade began, "Haruno Sakura has suffered from multiple injuries including a dislocated elbow, three fingers with clean breaks and one finger that was shattered. Her left ankle seemed to have been twisted but I was able to mend this with merely my chakra." Tsunade swallowed…it was so hard to watch Kakashi's face fall as she spoke, "Her right hip was found to be dislocated but we were able to repair it with ease. She has suffered from various blows to her chest and face but all internal damage was stabilized this morning at 8am. There is a laceration that runs from her lower lip, across her chest, to her pelvic area which lead us to notice the intent of the damage inflicted upon her."

Kakashi choked. He was beginning to feel faint…this was a lot. Where would she have been fighting to receive injuries like this? "Which was?"

"She was raped, Kakashi. Her parents…her parents are dead. Murdered in a sense that was most disturbing." Tsunade didn't want to say it…there was no way to tone down this news.

"WHO DID THIS TO HER!" No one would get away with this, no one. Who would do this to her? She was so strong! The attacker must have been stronger…but how would another country's ninja make it this far into the city?

"…Swas mumbling. We could barely hear her, but we make it out to be Uchiha Sasuke."

"Fuck." Kakashi jumped up from his chair and ran into the hallway. With the description of her injuries he was pretty sure he would know where to find her. He would fucking kill that Sasuke bastard.

"KAKASHI!" Tsunade yelled at his shrinking figure running down the hall, "PREPARE YOURSELF! IT WON'T BE EASY!"

_**I don't know your face, no more…**_

_**Or feel the touch…**_

_**that I adore…**_

Sakura stood by the window next to her cold hospital bed. She had regained consciousness an hour prior and it didn't take long for all the memories to come rushing back. Immediately she had thrown up from the mental realization that her parents were dead and she was ruined. It hurt… The outside world was dark with rain and thunder. It was fitting to the mood. She was just staring blankly…not a single thought was held in her mind as she stood there.

Her skin was cold to the touch and no expression crossed her face. It was like she was devoid of existence, just an empty shell of the Sakura that had been there before.

Deep inside she was dying. No…she figured deep inside she was already dead. She had given up when she had crawled only to pass out in the road…there didn't seem to be a reason to fight it. She found such relaxation in the solitude of her own mind.

Her parents were gone, her innocence was stolen…and she had learned that living for merely a purpose was not enough. Purposes, and people, failed. She had none.

_**I don't know your face, no more…**_

_**It's just a place…I'm looking for…**_

"Sakura…" Kakashi stood in the doorway of her room, making no attempt to move forward.

She didn't even bother to acknowledge him. Whatever communications could have taken place between them didn't seem worth the effort to her. Why he was there was of none of her concern and she found a thought that wished him to just leave. She didn't even think she could speak if she tried. Speaking was useless. Living was useless. She had nothing to live for. No purpose, no dream…no nothing.

A look of sadness cut across Kakashi's face as he saw how bad she really was. Tsunade was not lying. Before, Sakura had brightened up the entire room with just her warmth. Before, she made his palms sweat and his heart skip beats.

It wasn't there. The room seemed to be as cold as ice…his heart did not flutter…his hands were not sweaty, they merely felt cold and clammy.

She wasn't there anymore.

Kakashi realized any of his attempts would go unwanted and he backed out of her room, shutting the door behind him with no further attempt at communication. The second the door was shut he fell backwards into it, unable to hold himself up…all his strength had vanished. Sliding down to his feet he held his head in his hands, pulling at his thick, silver, hair. He suddenly felt confined and ripped his headband away from his sharingan eye, letting it shine.

"Sakura…" he managed to choke out, trying not to cry. He couldn't help it. No matter how hard he tried to stop the knot rising in his chest , he couldn't do it. No amount of training could stop the tears once they decided to flow. Ninja were supposed to keep their emotions in check, it was a rule. He was breaking the rule…wouldn't be the first time now. It had been so many times now that he didn't even care anymore.

Tears…would she ever feel those again?

He choked in memory of her smiles and her touch. He bit his lip from the urge to scream. His body suddenly tensed up signifying a need for release and he quickly jumped to his feet to punch the wall across from the door with the sound of wood splintering. The wood tore into his hand as it came into contact and the feeling of flesh ripping felt so…real. And good. It felt good.

She was gone. Even though she was only a few feet away from him…she was gone.

_**We might as well be strangers in another town **_

_**We might as well be living in a different world**_

_**We might as well…**_

Tsunade came running at the sound of the crash and turned the corner to see Kakashi there, bent over, with his fist jammed into the wall. She rushed to him and grabbed his shoulders but he didn't even notice she was there. He was panting as he had just fought to the death. Tears were streaming out of both of his eyes. The sharingan looked as if it were on fire and had burned up the soul living behind it.

"Kakashi! Snap out of it!" Tsunade shook him in panic, "Not here! Don't hurt anyone here!" This wasn't good.

He was in his own world of pain, of self-loathing. The pain he inflicted upon himself psychologically made him feel whole…complete. The pain replaced the feeling he had once had from Sakura. Unable to contain himself he let out a scream, once again falling to his knees from weakness.

"Kakashi!" He could hear his name…someone needed him. "Stop! Please…"

Stop? To him, he wasn't doing anything. This feeling he had wasn't even enough to call existing. It was his fault…she was like this. He should have been with her! And it was also his fault that he would go right back into the routine of never speaking. He could do it… he had done it before.

He had done it the time his dreams were ripped from his hands. He had done it when Obito died.

Then, at least he still had purpose. He could recover with his purpose. Now, he didn't even have that. His purpose had died when he had failed to live up to it. All he wanted to do was protect her, with his entire life. He couldn't protect her. He hadn't protected her. Twice this has happened now. Sakura was not dead like Obito but she may as well have been.

He felt so weak.

The hands were still there, shaking him. He put the voice together in his mind, recognizing it as Tsunade.

"I said I would protect her from him…" he whispered so softly that Tsunade could barely hear.

"FUCK that GOD DAMN PIECE OF SHIT!" He lost it again, unable to think or even comprehend what he was doing or saying. He had stood straight and ripped his arms away from Tsunade almost violently.

"You Uchiha bastard! How do you like it! You've ripped apart the only hopes we had left. You've taken our purpose for living…" Kakashi's knees gave out beneath him once more and he fell against Tsunade. She held him there, sliding them both to the floor as sobs wretched out of the fragile man.

"My Blossom…" More crying.

"My Blossom…"

Oh how much it hurt to listen to him break…

_**I don't know your thoughts these days…**_

_**We're strangers in an empty space.**_

It was a week later and still it didn't look good, for either of them. Tsunade had watched two of her closest comrades break down to the possible point of no return.

How would they make it, without Kakashi's smiling face there to be so cocky? How would anyone ever be able to take his place? He hadn't left his apartment for days. She sent no one to check on him for she understood that he just needed his time.

She hadn't known that he and Sakura had so much between them. The fact that there was something was obvious, even Kakashi had admitted it…but there may have been so much there that even they didn't realize the power of it.

_/I would have given her anything…/_

Neither of them had died, yet, they both continued their lives as empty shells. They lacked the need for existence and they lacked the motivation to even end their own lives.

There was no talking to someone who couldn't even hear.

_**I don't understand your heart**_

_**It's easier to be apart.** _

Sakura lay in her hospital bed, staring up at the ceiling, not even blinking. She thought she heard the click of the door opening but she paid it no mind. It wasn't anyone important…she didn't have anyone important. Many people had attempted to visit her but she responded to no one. She didn't feel the need and the energy was lacking.

Her love had been ripped away from her that night. Her innocence and her family had been stolen.

Her wound stung as she breathed in and out on her chest…but she welcomed it. Physical pain was the only proof she had left of her existence.

She turned her head at the glimpse of a figure standing at her bedside. Naruto.

Consolation was not what she felt like right now. He tried saying hello. It didn't work. She didn't care enough to respond.

"Go away." She whispered. He was starting to infringe upon her solitude.

"We can help you get through this, Sakura! Please! Don't do this!" Naruto was pleading to her with tears running down the sides of his face. His friend…wasn't his friend anymore. He didn't even recognize her.

"Naruto, if you had no dreams and no purpose…would you have hope?" Her voice was raspy and she barely felt like exerting the energy to speak. All of a sudden this interaction…fast, so fast. The walls waved around her, they made her so dizzy.

"No…" Naruto placed the flower he had brought in on her chest and turned to walk out of the room, admitting to himself that she was right in a way. You could never force a dream on another.

Naruto would regret giving in so quickly. But at that moment it seemed the right thing to do. He was not even sure that he would ever have the right to go back and see her, or if she wanted him there.

_**We might as well be strangers in another town **_

_**We might as well be living in another town**_

_**We might as well…**_

_**Be strangers…**_

_**Be strangers…**_

_**For all I know of you now.**_

_**

* * *

** _

**Author's Note: **Wonderful thank you to Ninjashen (spelled correctly this time) for betaing! If it weren't for her I would have called Sakura "Bossom" instead of "Blossom" for the entire fic. For some reason I believe that would have taken away the angsty feel ;)

Chapters 11-15 on the works. I'm writing them in a time line that is quite sporadic.


	11. Will the Sun Ever Come Again?

It had been hard, but she had made it through. After a couple of weeks in the hospital she ventured out on her own. She didn't even cry when she sold the house her parents reared her in. There was no point to being sad, she reasoned. Unfortunately this time that theory came doubled with the theory there was no reason to be happy either.

Selling the house actually gave her an eerie sense of relief. She had decided it wasn't necessary for that part of her life to remain in any way shape or form. She no longer could make her parents proud, had no reason to pretend she was always happy again – it wouldn't fool anyone this time around. Keeping to herself would be her new way of life.

Her new residence was large, almost twice as large as her parents' place. They had left her a rather nice inheritance and she wasn't really motivated to save it. The more new things that came in, the more old things that went out. Having such empty space gave wonderful excuses to keep spending money just to fill it up. Some rooms were left empty on purpose, because she liked the sense of solitude.

New replaced old and each day approached with the same lack of enthusiasm as the day before. Her meditations no longer lead her into the cherry blossom grove; instead, it seemed like most of her time was spent staring lifelessly at the wall.

No one came to visit anymore. There had been attempts of befriending since she had left, but she ignored them, waiting for _him _to come and apologize. He never did show up. She started locking her door, much unlike before when she was happy for anyone to enter. Eventually Konoha got the hint and left her alone. She figured she was nothing really special in the first place. Not like Sasuke or Naruto.

The thought of Sasuke made her heart sting and her fists clench. Yet with all the discomfort his memory caused she found herself thinking about him often. It made her want to fight. It filled her with rage – often leading to a hole punched in the wall of her new house. It was okay though, she had plenty of time to fix them.

Boredom was all that filled her life. She felt as if she was wasting away, but at the same time she also felt that it didn't even matter. Her house was bland in decoration, and there was not much to occupy her time with in those walls. There was not a single mirror to be found throughout the entire house. A scar ran from the wasted girl's lip to her naval, a constant reminder of that night. Every time she caught image of herself she thought of the death of her parents. The scar weighed deep on her emotionally, but not because she was disfigured. There were many ninja who bore wounds. It affected her so because it brought back those memories that she preferred to forget.

The thought crossed her mind once or twice to accept a new mission. Of course at first she knew Tsunade would not approve. Her wounds had healed for the most part but strenuous activity might cause them to come anew. But they were okay now, and that was why she stood there in front of Tsunade's desk, three months after the incident.

"Sakura, I'm not sure this is a good idea."

Sakura remained silent, eyes on the powerful woman before her.

"But I have to admit we are short on those who will take these missions." It was a top rank mission and a solo one at that. An assassination. Sakura would have been the last person to ever sign up for this before the incident, but she was a different person now. Tsunade also hated to admit it, but Sakura probably was emotionally ready to become Anbu now. She had been physically ready before, but her calm and happy outlook on life would surely have been shattered far too quickly if she were allowed within the ranks of Anbu.

"This is the only solo. I want to work alone."

"I could notify you when a less..." Tsunade seemed to be searching for the correct word, "...intense mission for solo comes along."

"Logic says I should take this mission, Hokage-sama. I have nothing to lose."

Sadly, Tsunade realized that her former student was right, and without another moment of hesitation, she tossed her the folder containing the contents of the mission.

"You can not take this mission yet. It would be careless of me as Hokage to let one of my ninja go on a top-secret rank mission directly after recovery of such wounds. I will let you take this mission at a later date, for there is no rush, as long as you agree to go with a partner on a mission of a lesser caliber tomorrow."

Sakura scoffed and picked up the folder in a rather angrily motion. She was content that she had been permitted to go on this assassination mission, but she was not so pleased that she had to partner up for an easier one before hand. Tsunade noticed her displeasure while pondering the best person to partner this new Sakura with. In truth, Kakashi was the ideal ninja to accompany Sakura on her first return mission; however, she felt that the two needed to work things out on their own. Of course, Kakashi had been pestering Tsunade for these missions as well, but she wouldn't budge. Kakashi had no reason to live, and was just searching for ways out without actually doing it himself. Sakura's motives seemed somewhat different. Yes, there was loneliness in her eyes, and despair. But despair meant hope, in a roundabout way. Kakashi's eyes were cold and solid as glass. Perhaps at a later time, once they began to live a bit more, she would entrust such a responsibility on the old team.

"You will be with Neji." Tsunade made her decision, convinced that Neji would be the person out of all Sakura's old classmates that would bother her the least.

_And you probably don't want to hear tomorrow's another day_

_Well I promise you you'll see the sun again_

_And you're asking me why pain's the only way to happiness_

_And I promise you you'll see the sun again._

Things went back to normal for Kakashi. Normal wasn't the best place to be for him either. Throughout his life, normal consisted of pain and work. Pain because he knew, for a fact now, that life was not going to get any better. His last attempt had failed and he had lost the one thing that had made him happy. Oh, she wasn't gone for good, not physically, but he could not bring himself to see her. He knew if he did, he'd start feeling something again. That something would be along the lines of a deep regret for not keeping his promise to protect her.

Minutes passed into hours, hours passed into days, and days passed into weeks. While it seemed like time passed so quickly, it stood still just the same. He still worked. Several missions were taken on that involved team cooperation, but Tsunade nearly always had him lead. He was a good leader, and unbiased at this point. He could look at things with a clear head, surprisingly enough.

He would fight until death, for the only thing he had left to live for was Konoha. His life was no longer for himself, or anyone else. Friends didn't hang around much longer after he retreated into his old shell. Gemma still came around, because Gemma understood. Yet no matter how many attempts were made at getting the old Kakashi back, he didn't even peek through the surface. So, eventually Gemma gave up as well, but not for lack of trying.

Kakashi had taken upon himself two weeks of solitude. It had taken him that long to face the day again, which after he thought about it didn't seem that long at all. Practice makes perfect, even in cases such as these. God knows he had enough prior experience at love and loss to make him pretty damn perfect at it. This was the last time, he swore to himself. After this, there would be no more love. There would be no more loss.

_And yes they'll ask you where you've been_

_And you'll have to tell them again and again_

It was the following morning, and Sakura stood in the briefing room for her rank-B mission. She was told her partner would be Neji, and that was exactly whom she was waiting on. At least she knew that Neji would most likely not bother her. With all his ramblings on fate, she figured he didn't have much desire to discuss how the past could have been different, or what had even happened to her. If Sakura had been capable of calm and uplifting thoughts, she would have appreciated Tsunade's consideration in this decision.

"Sakura."

Sakura looked up from the floor, which she had found herself staring at for quite some time. A kunai was twirling in one hand and she looked very inpatient as well as aggravated. When her gaze caught Neji's, he could not help but to step back slightly in shock. She looked absolutely terrible, and there really was no nicer way to put it. Her hair had been cut off, the jagged ends having obviously not even seen a brush in days. Large black circles encompassed her eyes, looking her more akin to Gaara than the happy kunoichi she once was. She made no effort to hide the hideous scar that was now graced upon the length of her body. He wept inside for her. This was one of those situations in which fate was not kind upon an innocent person. He could hide the reminder sketched upon his forehead, but she would not have such luck.

Without speaking, she stood and walked out. He followed her. Tsunade had told him that Sakura was to be in charge, she was the one given all the details of the mission after all.

_Do you remember telling me you found the sweetest thing of all_

_You said one day this was worth dying for_

_So be thankful you knew her at all_

_But it's no more_

Kakashi drowned his sorrows in the local bar, which was the best place to do it, he figured. Getting drunk at home was not his forte because the last time he had embarked on that it had ended up badly. He stumbled around in anger, his fist coming in contact with ever mirror he could find. He woke up the next morning on his bathroom floor, hungover and bloody. At least while he was in public there would be people with the will to restrain him. God knows he did not have that will himself.

Tonight Kakashi was lonely. What he had always done in the past was find a woman to quench that lonely thirst just for a night. He planned on doing this same thing tonight, the first time since the incident. However, he did not realize that it was not a physical solitude that he felt. Part of him was missing, and a little rough sex was not going to bring that back.

And so he did just that. One of his old flings was more than willing and practically threw herself on top of him after her shift at the bar was over. The girl had missed this broody ninja, but she had missed his touch even more. They went back to her place, stumbling drunk over each other. She was laughing and he was doing all he could to not have the scowl on his face scare her away. He didn't want her company, just the physical pleasures she had to offer. They soon found themselves in her bedroom, undressing one another in a fury of lust.

Something was different for Kakashi, something just wasn't right. The touch of her skin. The feeling of her breath on his body. It wasn't right. It was too rough. It didn't smell right. He was so dizzy and nothing was going as he planned. The plump breasts in his hands were too large, they weren't Sakura's. These breasts were not firm and the feeling of them almost made him nauseous. This was wrong, he remembered her as being a wonderful lover. Something about her was not quenching the physical need he felt. Where was Sakura's dainty body? No… this wasn't Sakura. Sakura's skin was not nearly so rough. The small kunoichi did not have fingernails that dug into his skin. Sakura would never have slept with him on call.

Frustrated and drunk beyond conscious recall, Kakashi pushed the woman off of him so violently that she hit the wall beyond the bed. He stood up to leave, but his head felt so heavy and he could not get his feet to cooperate with him. He didn't even know where he was or how to get out. Eyes closing, he slipped into darkness, with the screeching voice of a naked woman following after him.

"You're…not her…you're not…" He whimpered. And even though the woman was so upset with him for the violent action, she couldn't help but notice by the pain written across his face how fragile this strong man actually was.

* * *

The mission went smoothly. It was a supply mission through enemy territory, but they encountered no enemy assaults. Sakura still had her strength, though she found she was getting slightly winded as they reached their destination camp. She did not voice this, because the physical pain was a nice reminder to get her mind off of the emotional pain. So she kept going. Neji, however, was smarter than he let on to Sakuraand insisted they stop. Sakura was covered in sweat and her breathing patterns were getting no better, even when they changed to a slower pace.

As soon as they stopped in a clearing, the sky opened up with a torrent of rain. Rain was fitting to Sakura's moods these days. She threw her head back and looked into the sky, the rain hitting her face, some drops flowing down the contour of her scar leaving an almost pleasant burning sensation. It felt as if her scar was on fire. The silver shade of the clouds reminded her of something, but she could not quite put her finger on it. It wasn't a particularly bad reminder, she concluded. She closed her eyes, and there he was. His face was so clear, so sad. Kakashi.

Sakura let out a choked sob and fell to her knees. No matter what she did, that gaze of his would pop into her mind more often than not. It wasn't wanted there. Why couldn't her mind just realize this, she did not want it there! It brought back awful memories, and though she had so much to be thankful for from him…she could not forgive him for not protecting her. She almost loved…no. She did not love him. She never loved anyone. At least this is what she had talked herself into believing. The reality of her emotions was quite different than the post-traumatic reality of her mind.

"Sakura…" Neji approached the solemn looking girl and placed a hand on her drenched shoulder. The rain was hitting them both and creating an almost surreal setting for the two of them. Their surroundings echoed every element of Sakura's loneliness and pain.

"You're awaiting that day aren't you." Neji spoke assuredly to Sakura, breaking the silence between them that had persisted stubbornly throughout most of the mission. He couldn't blame her and he did not want to pry. However, this was a question he felt the need to ask.

"What day?" Sakura turned her head to look at him, a sense of loss in her eyes. For this one moment Neji could see the old Sakura within her. Her eyes were so wide and she looked so innocent as the rain fell in droplets down her face. She was still the same girl, after all.

"That day you feel good again."

"You believe in fate, am I right, Neji?" The innocent expression was now wiped from her face, a serious and angry expression now contorting her features. He hoped he had not said the wrong thing. He felt that there wouldn't really be any right or wrong things to say to Sakura, though. Anything said to her would make her feel no better or no worse than she already did.

"Yes, I believe in fate."

"That day is not mapped out in my destiny." Sakura turned her gaze to the grass beneath her, and a tear dropped in mixture of all the rain. Neji understood now, this rain fell for her, and it would continue falling until a miracle came. That miracle, according to fate, would no doubt be death.

* * *

I really need my previous proofreader to email me at please! I have lost your email address and no longer have a proofreader :(

Song by Dido.


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